Ghetto Pain - *BOY WONDER*

Ghetto Pain
yo this is my life the reasons at times I wanted to die
looking at ya mom in hospitals tubes before ya eyes
not knowing if she was coming back killed me inside
plus ya brother deals the same pain so it kills ya pride
on top of it he’s struggling not to enter the ambulance
cause he took some acid and he can’t break the trance
he’s lying in the tub in a pool a his slit wrist blood
i’m young and shook and always saw him a slick thug
out a two brothers I gave him more love in the hospital
tears crushed my face thinking why me how’s it possible
this ain’t logical long island jewish had me foolish
fearing my own kind thinking you’d kill me I’m stupid

Im ghetto this broken apartments killing me
Memories concealing me from being happy
Cursing at my mom remembering her slap me
I feel damned scammed in life and man! I just wanna rap B!

I lead a life you could write a movie on for the theater
stressed killing mice and roaches like a non believer
It’s still murder but why me who would a thought
I would a sought death hitting myself I literally fought
out in BK wishing the one who stepped out his whip
would a popped in the clip and let the triggers fist rip
with bullets threw my lip that night I was talking shit
too pussy ta take my own life I felt like I was walking clit
drunk out my ass flashbacks from alcohol and shrooms
had me fighting a demon like a reality a seeing cartoons
punching trees till my knuckles bled you think I care?
I said fuck money and life throwing my avirex somewhere

Im ghetto this broken apartments killing me
Memories concealing me from being happy
Cursing at my mom remembering her slap me
I feel damned scammed in life and man! I just wanna rap B!


woke up in my bed soar face with pain in my head
thinking how many times I actually should be dead
all the many car accidents and wrong medications
thankful my moms is one a those nursing sensations
over fifty I’m surprised she had so much patience
above all women we ghetto but ma I love ya fragrance
It’s amazing I felt all this and I’m told I’ll live long
gypsies said the world will know my name I feel their wrong
I never been conceited so they say I’m depressed
obsessed with me they wont get of a my hearts chest
that’s for the haters awaiting me to not find success
this life got me smoking bones again in unkind stress


Im ghetto this broken apartments killing me
Memories concealing me from being happy
Cursing at my mom remembering her slap me
I feel damned scammed in life and man! I just wanna rap B!

My Linx
Demonz in me
Comic Satire

flow-this was good throughout the whole thing i thought...it stayed on track and it would be good for audio im thinkin
emotion-good amount of emotion, the chorus was good for this and the situations you presented brought out a lot of good emotion with your mom and the rest of the family and the things going on...
imagery-i didnt sense a lot here...i noticed some but i felt it was lacking and the way the story was you didnt need much imagery the emotion was enough to make the song good...
vocab-you had a good amount of vocab some lines didnt have some but most of them had a descent amount

overall good piece...i liked it...9/10

peace

This was good. You have it all planned out, so its set up for audio. You put a lot of feeling into this, and you were descriptive also. There were some places that you could have added more wordplay. Some lines could have been edited for more similarity in the lines, but overall the flow was good.

thanxx yall uppin for more yall

liked this one, i was feelin it the hole way through good flow and vocab good job

yo dogg this was hot...aint really nothin u need to improve on so to me this was a 9.5/10...your flow was excellent it kept it runnin smoothly...your vocab was good and the emotion was there...hot shit my nigga...Bounty hunters dogg we up in here!!!Pm me so we called get a collab out ight...pz

thanx yall for da feed be on the look out for the new crew Bounty Hunters ran by myself and DaYoungsta

This was a good drop you had a nice flow and it was soild all the way through. But the story to this piece was excellent. I liked read this it interested me nice work and I hope that you keep posting and giving feedback.

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=168556