-
Special Delivery...
yo wuss good im new here iight, came to rip ya amateurs check it out...
If i pull out, its just to see how fast u run//
get GHOST like where im at when da badges come//
cats act like dey tuff but i laugh at'em//
i see a ounce on da strip gotta grab me one//
cuz da kid puff piff til' my casket's brung//
every chick dat i hit gets bagged and sprung//
cuz my dick stay dipped in dat MAG-E-NUM//
stop actin dumb, sayin my packs a fraid//
got gats dat bang heads like i masterbate//
if u flash ya cake, ima snatch ya cake//
bitches kno i get cheeks like after shave//
ice floss so much my wrist ask for shades//
while my niggas in da basement baggin haze//
and its all facts in dis rap..never exaggerate...
-
The piece was alright in my opinion. The punches and metas where alright as well. I think you could have used bertter vocabulary. For starters it sounds alright it looks like you be smashing dude in no time. If you had made it longer i think it would have been better. But hey ..... dont let me tell you what to do! Keep writing you got talent. But Imma keep it real the lines sound familiar have you posted it in another site?
I might be wrong and if I am Keep doing ya thing Cuz like snoop.
-
you're obsessed with multi's, and you sacrifice content to rhyme. focus on a rhymes or a story with meaning, something significant, this was more of a freestyle than anything else, sort of a self-glorification piece.
tighten up, spell correctly or at least somewhat grammatically correct so that it isnt liek reading a piece from a five year old. you're rhyming ability is decent, you have potential, just come with better material.
1
-
