Hustle Harder

I Keep my Packs Wrapped in the Back of a Coupe
im Flippin So Many Birds i Cought the Avian Flu
Hustle all day long, So im Always in the Mood
Touch a Stack and Get your Head Wrapped like Arabians Do
So Dont play With The Dude
Im About Money Bitch Believe me
i Put Da-Wight First, Like my Last name Was Freeny
im On the Block Where the Piffer The Green Be
the Glock make u Drop the Rock Quicker than Beanie
u Seen D in a Clean Tee where them Fien's Be
Cuz My White Bottle'd up, Like i Dream of Geenie
4 That i Get more Ass then the Back of a Bikini
Always Flashy when u See Me..
im Like Pha-reel... my Ice Creamy
Cuz i Can Make A Power-Baller Dissapear Quciker than Chingy
the Packs Pack a Punch like Ronald Winky
u Cant out Think Me, Enuff Work 2 Ship and Front
Shit i Give all my Worker's a Grip and Lunch
if a K-9 Sniff my Trunk That Bitch a Be Sick 4 Months

No, i really didn't get into this, Your flow was okay, but the structure of the flow wasn't up to scratch to be honest, and your wording didn't seem to reflect any signs imagery or emotion in what you were writting, i mean the topic chice was really not very good, been done so many times it's actually hated now... But that's irrelivant as you could have changed the topic into something so much more than what you wrote, your internals were basically simple... theres nothing wrong with simplicity, but you need to know how to use it your advantage, with zero hate, i feel you may need alot of work on your pireces, but i'm sure in time you'll grasp new concepts and improve vastly, still well done for trying man...

i feel u.. i got a different flow than what im seeing alot of on here... i know i need work on my structure im used to just writing shit down to songs on paper.. but with text i use no beat... im not on any poetic type imagery and emotion's type stuff... dont get me wrong i appreciate everything and all aspects of people's critisism because its always room for improvement... i just think my flow is for beats and not text... but u know i still drop in here... and thanks for the feed ill definatley take that into mind when i drop some more stuff... gotta please your audience whatever audience that is u feel me.... 1

it seams more commercial then anything not that thats bad but when you feed stereotypes nothing evolves and i feel like thats what u did here very simple thug style ballad.

the word choice wasnt good but duke dont trip ur right u have a good lyricz for beatz style which is how i like to write most of the time but u can still have good vocab wit ur style u know, but the overall flow of ur verse was good
i really like the rhyming it reminded me of spm's style bcuz he likez to use the same ending sound over and over in a lot of his verses
overall it was decent just improve that structure and vocab a lil bit and you'll be fine~stay up

nah i didnt feel this peice, dont get me wrong this may sound tight to a beat anf the flo was ok but its what i really wanna see in the o'm forum nah mean, otherwise i would jus go to the audio section to haer those kinda lyrics, need to strengthing ya vocab bruv,

definatley appreciate that... ima drop somthin for u all... but good look'n on the feed... upn.........