Re: All criticism welcome
you can wright me down but get it right youll never take me down
i stand proud but i dont talk to loud
all bite n a lil growl i turn into a monster at night at the full moon i howl
Re: All criticism welcome
^ The fuck is going on here?
Anyways,
You seem to be all over the place, but I guess I'm like that too. Your way kind of detracts from the piece as a whole, though. Also, the writing could be more "structured" to help the fluidity of the piece. Your subject matter isn't bad, a bit simplistic for my taste. This seems more like a piece for fun as the title would suggest to help you writing, so if I were to offer any suggestions it would be to nail down a topic and see if you can keep focus throughout. Also, brush up your structure and keep it consistent, because your first four bars are well composed, but then it gets weird from there.
Keep it up!
Re: All criticism welcome
I like that you use the same rhyme structure like the same tone of word repetitively for like a paragraph or so... it’s like a signature style or a call sign you can use on future works. Your tone and ready to argue with the site, good luck, a lot of people can be assholes and will tear you down... but your hype was conveyed and I felt the energy - just hope your strong