Fallcano Rnd 1:Sobe Vs MV - Open For Feed

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RB Front Lines Presents
FALLCANO

RULES
10 Lines(5 Bars)
DUE: One Week(Tuesday NOV 20Th) By 11:59PM PST
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@Sobe @MV

check

check

we returning to the grind, same position but thats were the similarities stop
i got back up, face down writin to top Pleth...ur facedown, backup tryna give pleth top
bout to put'em on the spot, disrespectful as fuck but this's my way
if i drop first and disobey, from that point these niggas aint gonna listen to shit you say
been waiting for a body to put on display, and bomb chose this prick
asked him for a sacrificial lamb, he said "Have your way" now here we are so be it
i shoulder shit then reload the clip, in the front seat they'll find you slumped
be in the newspaper faster than joeboston researching a battle for 1-2 punch
im leaving him skunked, everyday of the month ya bae's face can get humped
sucking until her jaws connoisseur...but she cant get enough of the taste of my cum

MV wins Open for feed

we returning to the grind, same position but thats were the similarities stop
i got back up, face down writin to top Pleth...ur facedown, backup tryna give pleth top
-decent opener here. concept was good: yall on the same level, but not the same. i dig it

bout to put'em on the spot, disrespectful as fuck but this's my way
if i drop first and disobey, from that point these niggas aint gonna listen to shit you say
-this is nice. idk if its pronounced so-bee or so bay. As is, this works

been waiting for a body to put on display, and bomb chose this prick
asked him for a sacrificial lamb, he said "Have your way" now here we are so be it
-not feeling how u executed this idea.

i shoulder shit then reload the clip, in the front seat they'll find you slumped
be in the newspaper faster than joeboston researching a battle for 1-2 punch
-this was wack imo.

im leaving him skunked, everyday of the month ya bae's face can get humped
sucking until her jaws connoisseur...but she cant get enough of the taste of my cum
-good concept. But the wp is forced. This a no for me



overall. good drop. just tweak those executions a bit

didnt like the opener, disobey could have been much more dis sobe bay was what i thought u were going for, lamb line was a filler, nothin special about the JB line, completely didnt like the closer.

Try to be more concise. less is more.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by MV

we returning to the grind, same position but thats were the similarities stop
i got back up, face down writin to top Pleth...ur facedown, backup tryna give pleth top
Funny
bout to put'em on the spot, disrespectful as fuck but this's my way
if i drop first and disobey, from that point these niggas aint gonna listen to shit you say
Fire
been waiting for a body to put on display, and bomb chose this prick
asked him for a sacrificial lamb, he said "Have your way" now here we are so be it
EH nah
i shoulder shit then reload the clip, in the front seat they'll find you slumped
be in the newspaper faster than joeboston researching a battle for 1-2 punch
Lolol I dig
im leaving him skunked, everyday of the month ya bae's face can get humped
sucking until her jaws connoisseur...but she cant get enough of the taste of my cum
Don't really get lol

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Disobey and Boston were fire imo

Good drop homie

Quote:

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Originally Posted by MV

we returning to the grind, same position but thats were the similarities stop
i got back up, face down writin to top Pleth...ur facedown, backup tryna give pleth top
This was low key dope. I like this.
bout to put'em on the spot, disrespectful as fuck but this's my way
if i drop first and disobey, from that point these niggas aint gonna listen to shit you say
This was okay. Disobey struck me as a bit forced as I would assume A one is pronounced like so be.
been waiting for a body to put on display, and bomb chose this prick
asked him for a sacrificial lamb, he said "Have your way" now here we are so be it
This was okay. The so be it part feel underplayed, and could have been set up better. Still lands though.
i shoulder shit then reload the clip, in the front seat they'll find you slumped
be in the newspaper faster than joeboston researching a battle for 1-2 punch
This was nice. And true af. Good shit.
im leaving him skunked, everyday of the month ya bae's face can get humped
sucking until her jaws connoisseur...but she cant get enough of the taste of my cum
Wordplay missed. Connoisseur is pronounced con uh sewer. Doesn't really work phonetically with what I believe you were going for, "kind of sore". But I can appreciate the creativity

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ALL in all, a pretty solid verse. Some of the wordplay wasn't as concise as I like, but every bar had elements I liked. The opener and newspaper flip were fuego. Good shit.

In my favor or not I appreciate the feedback fellas. Thanks and good luck in all of your battles

Closed