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Hands
I'm loosely fixated
I am the greatest on Earth on my block
I try not to define the finer points of myself with the tip of a Scud rocket
But I will shoot my shit..loosely
Yet it seems when my greatness is tested in the form of bringing help
I'm using a compacted style to battle these demons filling slots of those dispatched
Knowing that the full extension of my reach is powerful
I'm relegated to flicks of the fingers
Plucking at cancers like a virgin popping the top of a clit...stupidly
It's dumb but effective...if you get my drift....
And there are times that I want to lay these paws on jaws
Cave teeth to make domino tops
Use the droplets of blood for dots
BIG SIX TO THE BOARD NIGGA!!!
but the fights that surround me don't allow for that glee
Keeping me from the relief that I crave for
So in breaks attained I shadow box
http://network.mugenguild.com/guild/...zumbi_anim.gif
Waiting to put that ultimate move on display and rock-a-bye that ass
Now I am getting too into myself
And these fights are getting tedious as the opponents are getting stronger
I can't flick these grunts off me protecting you all
I can't remove these tactics that are submissive until contracted
I can't see victory sometimes
I can't lose
My hands become weary as the trust in them fail at times
Dropping bombs have been reduce to dropping dimes
And the passes are not connecting
My communication is worse than a Sprint cellphone
So now I wish my hands can regain that greatness it has
Save my fiance from falling victim to thyroid cancer
Or reverse my Uncle's plight from pancreatic cancer
And until those prayers are answer
I will keep fighting for your freedom.....
With these hands....
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Re: Hands
I'm loosely fixated
I like the mix of words here...'loosely' and 'fixated'. To me it shows me that you can fixate more but are aware of your behaviour. That's good self reflection with well thought out wording.
I am the greatest on Earth on my block
This confuses me a little bit. How can one be the greatest on Earth...on his block? I'm sure I've missed something here,
but I don't know what.
I try not to define the finer points of myself with the tip of a Scud rocket
But I will shoot my shit..loosely
Yet it seems when my greatness is tested in the form of bringing help
I'm using a compacted style to battle these demons filling slots of those dispatched
Knowing that the full extension of my reach is powerful
I'm relegated to flicks of the fingers
It's like I can see the flickering now. Like a trigger happy cop. A walking time bomb, ready if needed to explode.
Plucking at cancers like a virgin popping the top of a clit...stupidly
Interesting comparison.
It's dumb but effective...if you get my drift....
I do.
And there are times that I want to lay these paws on jaws
Love that line. The rhyme. The meaning. It's effective.
Cave teeth to make domino tops
Use the droplets of blood for dots
BIG SIX TO THE BOARD NIGGA!!!
but the fights that surround me don't allow for that glee
No. Cause cancer's not a game. Although it seems to play with us. It's always a struggle who'll outwit carcinoma.
Keeping me from the relief that I crave for
So in breaks attained I shadow box
I like this 143. Nice pace here as well.
Waiting to put that ultimate move on display and rock-a-bye that ass
You've got a way with words, that's for sure. 'rock a bye that ass' is cool.
Now I am getting too into myself
And these fights are getting tedious as the opponents are getting stronger
This sentence kills me. It's so true.
I can't flick these grunts off me protecting you all
I can't remove these tactics that are submissive until contracted
I can't see victory sometimes
I can't lose
So much pressure. You can't see wining happening at times, more so probably when you're emotionally tired and drained,
and yet you can't lose either. It's like being stuck in some time warp trance that you can't escape from.
My hands become weary as the trust in them fail at times
Dropping bombs have been reduced to dropping dimes
: ( I think you do well expressing sentiments like this. They're raw in emotion, organic phrases.
And the passes are not connecting
My communication is worse than a Sprint cellphone
So now I wish my hands can regain that greatness it has
Do you mean....'they have'?
Save my fiance from falling victim to thyroid cancer
Or reverse my Uncle's plight from pancreatic cancer
And until those prayers are answered
I will keep fighting for your freedom.....
With these hands....
Wonderfully strong outro 143.
You tend to pull out real life struggles in fights like these. You're able to reach inside and grab the jugular and yank it out,
killing what was bad, and leaving nothing but a healthy mind. I like that you're able to draw internally what your heart tells you,
without filler, without trying to impress, using only your true emotion.
I think you did well with this. A couple lines I didn't get, not sure, could be me, just not sure how I was supposed to interpret certain phrases at times. But sometimes I think it's the australian/american thing too. There's a lot of stuff I hear on here that I don't hear in where I live. Other than that though, I think you're ability to dig deep, and delve into such subject matter and paint it with an artists brush, shows talent. Good luck with it all 143. My prayers are with you and your family.
Also, thanks for the feed of my piece. Always appreciated.
Interesting Read. Heartfelt.
Thank you.
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Re: Hands
Easily some of the most raw poetry and unbridled emotion comes from you. It's a breath of fresh air, where I sometimes hold back you just let it all out in one gust of fucking wind that blows shit away like a category five hurricane. Love it, man.
Two sides of cancer on this. Battle with literal cancer and the anger that comes with it, or the figurative, scud rocket trying to blow up the multitude of problems/cancers in your life. It can be difficult as hell trying to remove the shit that's eating away at your life and draining away at your energy. Tedious, indeed.
Just, overall, digging the raw battle here, the feeling of wanting to cave in faces and unload the fists of fury. Sometimes you just wanna punch something, and I get that.
Directing your hands in the right direction against enemies you have no true control against. Love this, 143. It's not polished, it's not structured in any particular way, it's let loose. Good shit, man.