that's life pt1: a must peep don't sleep

[oddly ill]

people say that the youth of today/
got it good in every and any perspective manner and way/
they say that compared to their life we got it made easy/
i just sit back laugh and look at these fucks like they're crazy/
cause ya'll have absolutely no idea how are life realy is/
ya'll looked down on 19 year kim with a 3 year kid/
ya'll called her a slut and slut but know half of the story/
ya'll got an image of her as that trick on yesterdays maury/
so let me tell you what happened how she got pregnant with her daughter/
it all started with the absence of her mother and alchoholic father/
whenever he bothered to get some juice inside of his system/
he would go and molest her and her younger sister/
she was ten and realized her house wasn't a place for a child/
so she packed some of her clothes and ran for 20 miles/
she got to her aunts house worn out and filled with tears/
her aunt told her that she could stay for a few years/
until the day her aunt died straight flat on her back/
because of her addiction for sex and dangerous habbit with crack/
kim was a young girl now tryin to survie on her own/
with nobody to help her except for some buged out cusins at home/
no money in her pockets and no food for her to eat/
so she dropped out of school and sold her body on the street/
then it happened one day a customer busted a rubber/
now she's not know as a growin girl she's know as a young mother/

when people are forced to do things that no one would like/
we must must al realized that that's just life/
when things are fucked up and we just wanna make it right/
when worst comes to worst just know that's life/

i'll put pt2 in when i get replies

[Tactixx]

i thought this was a decent piece....There was alot of emotion in this...the imagery i thought was portrayed well....original concept, havent read a piece like that before...
it was a nice read, good story...i'll check out pt.2 when you put it up....keep at it.
peace.

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=113431

[oddly ill]

good lookin on the reply but i need more replies to add more so i don't feal like i'm just waistin my time on it aight

[oddly ill]

still need more replies

[oddly ill]

cmon people quit sleepin on my shit

[Vokal Rights]

Ayo, You got some tight shit....I liked this one...you made me run through the story visually in my head, the imagery was tight the flow was tight and the story was tight....good spit keep it up...peace.

[oddly ill]

good look on the wake up calls the rest of ya'll are bitches

[Knowledge]

breakdown:

topic -- kinda original..decent
flow-- good
creativity-- average
structure-- i like it
vocab-- alittle simplistic..can improve
potential-- it's present, just magnify it
elevation-- can use some..but hey, we all can
overall-- decent peice

and yeah-- get used to bein' slept on..its communicable around here..lol

keep postin'

peace

[oddly ill]

good lookin on all the replies ya'll i'm out

[oddly ill]

stitll uppin