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Thread: for am i done?

  1. #1
    monkeypoet
    Guest

    for am i done?

    looking into the mirrior
    your supposed to see 3-d
    its hard to look in the mirrior always
    when everyone is everything id rather be

    most people see a person
    clear, respected, sharp
    their skin is blemishless unlike mine
    because mines full of wounds from words that harp

    the words that literally
    cut past my soul, past my skin
    its because of these words
    that my wrists are what i push the knife in

    because the words tell me im unreal
    non-exsistant, just a portrayl
    of a person, for a real persons like is ripe
    and mine just seems to be stale

    i see a 2-d image
    dull, set in black and white
    because my own thoughts
    have killed the colors in my internal fight

    with reality and fakeness
    for i can see that im fading away
    ill just finish my life, kill my soul now
    so in the future it and i wont rot and decay

  2. #2
    miz kitta
    Guest
    wow sarah all i can say wow.......i liked this one cuz i can relate... more then ur other newer ones.... but alot of ppl cant really except them selves umm like me... but anyway this had a good flow
    because mines full of wounds from words that harp
    harp or harm?... blah well anyway its late im upset.... and i read ur poem i liked it alot... diggin thiz much...respect~peace~ me

  3. #3
    Certified Like A COW Varentao's Avatar
    Join Date
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    since you first came here monkey....you really have elevated to a much higher leve...this was full of pure emotions...executed so well...and the imagery was so good....heavy piece...respect...
    I'm too secure to have a signature.

    Oh.

  4. #4
    monkeypoet
    Guest
    leah- thanks for the reply.... yea, i like this peice tooo... and i see alot of peeps that go thru the same thing so i wrote bout it.. its supposed to be harp... as in people harping on u... lol... thanks, love to ya

    varentao: back when u were darneck, *hehe* u were one of teh first peeps to reply to my stuff, even though i look back on it now and go, "wow, i sucked" and i thank u for always taken ur time to read my work, and im glad u apreciate it, cuz i always love ur critique on my poems... love to ya

  5. #5
    2nd2none
    Guest
    well I know I aint been here in a while...and I come back to hotness..very deep piece...no need for a quote I liked the whole thing

  6. #6
    monkeypoet
    Guest
    2nd2none: its nice to see ya back.... ne way, thanks for the reply, i really aprreciate it CUZ EVERYONE IS SLEEPING!!!!! lol, thanks again , love to ya

  7. #7
    danja
    Guest
    very meaningful and deep;

    because the words tell me im unreal
    non-exsistant, just a portrayl
    of a person, for a real persons like is ripe
    and mine just seems to be stale

    was feeling that.

  8. #8
    monkeypoet
    Guest
    danja: thanks for the reply, even though when i typed it, i accidentally put "like" in the 3rd line for "life" lol... thanks... love to ya

  9. #9
    [*¤ÐîMêØñФ* ]
    Guest
    wow, this was dope!
    Much props ...
    Elevatin to a higher level fo` sure!

    Pz xXx DiMe
    respect ~1~

  10. #10
    Poetic blais
    Guest
    monkey? damn this poem was real n(y)ce, darneck was right youve really been gettin better and better in your pieces, fav linez below

    most people see a person
    clear, respected, sharp
    their skin is blemishless unlike mine
    because mines full of wounds from words that harp ---monkeypoet

    captured attension easily understand cuz of the way you put it, much respect on this poem monkey...pz

  11. #11
    monkeypoet
    Guest
    [*¤ÐîMêØñФ* ] : thanks for the reply... im glad u liked it... your replys mean alot to me... love to ya

    Poetic Blais: thanks for the reply... thats what i strive for, to capture the attention easily... im glad u enjoyed...love to ya

  12. #12
    Gunz -N- $tackZ
    Join Date
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    yo dis piece wass poppin/ keep writing fam. i hope to see more of ur shyt. uno
    21-13-0

    ~~B~~ aka Synickle AKA Str8killa



    N.T.G

    copyright2002 G.S=GUNZ& STACKZ ANY UNAUTHORIZED REPRODUCTION OF THIS MATERIAL WILL BE SUBJECT TO PENALTY UNDER LAW.

  13. #13
    JOeY TeRRIFYING's Avatar
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    WHOA, that was hectic in imagery. didnt give me that good of a picture, but i wish postive thoughts. this was a really good peice in imagery and wordplay.ya got the content out really good and my fav lines were the 1 verse: when everyone is something i'd rather be. <<<----- thats a hot line!!! either way stay up and live postive. peace

    joey

  14. #14
    monkeypoet
    Guest
    synicle:thanks for the reply... undoubtedly will u see more of 'my shit'.... lol.. love to ya

    joey: thanks for the reply... that line *connected to teh line right before it* is one of my faves in this peice too.... im glad u liked the peice so much... love to ya

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