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Thread: life lessons

  1. #1
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    life lessons

    A dingy mindscape
    secure with nothing at all
    this lonely man sits
    unafflicted by his choices
    he swells in waves of sorrow
    clinging on to hope
    while vigor dwindles away
    he strays from his thoughts
    subjected by rejection
    now he begs for tomorrow
    comforted by booze
    sobered by reality
    scirrosus conquered
    depravation strangled him
    until he found the bottle
    shattered reflections
    turn into aggravation
    wants became my needs
    now I lay tube tied from greed
    life amounted to nothing
    I need help to breathe
    perspectives lost in machines
    look at what I gave
    dug my own grave to get high
    my kids dad is in the sky
    living for liquor
    not only cost me my life
    look at the children
    stare into there barren eyes
    learn life is meant to survive

    sorry, but carry on for your father who died
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  2. #2
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    bump please, this is my first time writing a tanka so i would like to know what you guys think
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  3. #3
    MEKANICAL-PENCIL
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    damn nice

  4. #4
    mostghetto
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    yea its good

  5. #5
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    well, thank you for the in depth feed douchebags.
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  6. #6
    GhettoGurl13
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    nice poem

  7. #7
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    some people just dont understand
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  8. #8
    Conquering Lion Prince Escobar's Avatar
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    Ugh the freeposts in this thread are disgusting...why aren't the mods on this like white on rice?
    Laying face down in the mainstream.
    Po.Ethics.

  9. #9
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
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    nice sneaky freepost
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