Schizophrantic! knowledge hallogen.

[Josey™]

"You're sick. . . " He replies fantically.
"No" I say, and "no" I repeat. He doesn't understand.

"This is not a phase. It's lifetime disorder. Here's your treatment. I want you to go home, and write a diary of your experiences. Read it, and revise it."

In and out as they boogie between corners of walls,
They range from sizes in between tall and small and I pray
that these 2-D phases will fall yet the reverie sung in between
melodies are those conducted of magistrate felonies, and I cannot
hear anything but the ringing of a phone in my head, BRR-INNNG!
Leave me alone, I am asleep, in bed, dead. I did not do anything!
Little man inside there! Answer the ring! Let the voice inside bring
whatever it will bring! And I foster the thoughts, adopt them in a way,
and I cannot believe that this entertainment will be fun for all day! Pop,
pop of my ears! Doc, doc! I’m sorry, but I just need some beers, no medication
of the sick flick mental, I’m done being gentle with these figures on my mind!
I mean ON my mind! Hold a microscope to my forehead and see what you’ll
find!
I am
not sick
But thoughts
are so thick,
as my head slams into the ground,
resound is not found as it is so real
now, blood is a sound,
a song, and all along I knew I could
not go out.
Schizofrantic!
Schizopanic!
I want to swim off and drown in the
Schizolantic!
rushing off into moonlight on a one way
ticket into the sky.
I am not sick,
But these thoughts
will not leave me a-lone.
_______________________________________________
[(c) DJ. 2006. 3:46. 9/18.2006]
A Day On RB - Relli_Mak
Grass Roots on Tour

[P. Mortuus]

Quite good, enjoyable read...I liked how you played the role and gave a first person perspective though there was awkardness here and ther but overall you flow was helped by the multie/inners and all. There was no set rhymescheme whichmeant that the reader had to keep concentration in check and read it all. This gave me an Eminem vibe at parts and a kind of retarded mentally unfit man shouting or maybe a paranoid talking to his demons or simply the Schizo as you had said. The reading structure was aight but the visual structure was quite a tip....lastly, i liked how you ended the piece "I am not sick, but these thoughts will not leave me a-lone"...that was a good closer and statement to end the piece. Overall, this was a short piece that gave a good read...light on the mind also.

Check, My Promiscious ways poem, if you can
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=309867

[Josey™]

up.

[The Vortex]

hmm. the first chapter. / intro was hard to follow in flow sense for me. i wasnt sure if it was supposed to rhyme or not or where it would rhyme. and i couldnt grasp a tight internal rhythm as such............was there in places but uhm


the second or shorter form piece did have some good interest to me as a short poem
nice lil fuckin around w/ sum wordplay. coo by me..short still tho. ...had a good short dose of blatant imagery....


that's 1

[Josey™]

up.