Tolerance

[Que-C]

My tolerance for these posers is goin quick,
my attitude's showin it,
more rage than when my autistic nephew's throwin fits.
Bleed 'em dry, their voices kept low,
that's why I keep 'em high,
to see 'em lie, via eye,
be advised, be alive.
Stay alert,
you can let 'em see you sweat,
but never say it hurts,
keep your anger at bay at first,
no matter what bull-shit may occure.
Lead 'em on,
and jus remember that you free to arm,
they gonna need alarms,
sneak up on 'em like I'm Vietcong.
They shook and worried,
no wonder why they look and scurry,
lookin scary,
I can smell their fear over Indians cookin curry.
Now it's time to confront and offend,
but if the drama wont end,
apply preasure to the back,
see if their neck don't bend.
Now everytime they take a breath it hurts,
make it hard to decifer if death is worse,
and if there's no room for mistakes,
there's plenty at the steps of church.

[The Vortex]

not bad. poetry was sort of there, content seemed sort of lacking for a lyrical piece, coz you diddnt really make any strong statements on what the purpose and meaning of the song was. so its like the idea was there but you diddnt develop the script into something more explosive, so would drop more as a poem as such . u got some good character in there though so developing that with some more elevated and explosive bars should be a good move forward

1

[Que-C]

good looks, i thought it was pretty garbage myself, sometimes i jus babble off 2 good bars and throw a title to it . . . haha, i appreciate the advice