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Thread: The Point Of No Return

  1. #1
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Dyl's Avatar
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    The Point Of No Return

    The Point Of No Return

    "Feicfidh mé thú ar an taobh eile mo chara, "


    Blood splutters out my stitched up sides,
    leaving towels soaked in a bloody bath,
    scalpels fish around inside, eyeing its catch
    as it tears through layers of rotten tissue.
    Machines whisper through the surgery room,
    gathering speed as minutes are wasted,
    panic levels rising, patience too hard to consume
    the point of no return is near,I can already taste it.

    Drowning in the sea of tomorrow, soon to be a memory
    life is a precious possession, death is a loss to one's soul,
    Time is a thief, robbing you of all hopes and ambitions
    It's a one way battle, erasing all those important decisions


    The machines now screaming in my ear,
    my heartbeat searches for instant life
    thumping into darkness, it runs out of light
    drowning beneath the dark cloth of death
    My eyes flicker asleep,I am sinking deep
    the voices of many now a meer echo.
    I have hit the line of sorrow to many a loved one
    I love you, never forget me,preserve these words
    "Agus feicfidh mé thú ar an taobh eile"
    Last edited by Dyl; July 17th, 2008 at 09:43 AM
    Heard about the guy who fell off a skyscraper?
    On his way down past each floor,he kept saying to reassure himself
    So far so good.....
    So far so good.....
    So far so good.....

    But how you fall doesn't matter
    Its how you land

  2. #2
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Dyl's Avatar
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    Heard about the guy who fell off a skyscraper?
    On his way down past each floor,he kept saying to reassure himself
    So far so good.....
    So far so good.....
    So far so good.....

    But how you fall doesn't matter
    Its how you land

  3. #3
    God Fist Spoken Deity's Avatar
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    Re: The Point Of No Return

    I've got to be honest... I didnt connect with this... I didnt feel it was unique and I dont feel it's really emotionally driven. I cant explain it... This doesnt mean it isnt, It just means I'm not seeing it...
    I think some of the sentences didnt work with the imagery you tried to portray. I felt some of them were kind of thrown together.
    drowning beneath the dark cloth of death
    My eyes flicker asleep,I am sinking deep
    I think is one of those lines... Just kind of 'eh' when it comes to words used to explain the imagery.
    I felt some of the imagery wasnt painted, just explained...

    I dunno... Maybe I'm missing it. Sorry if you dont dig my feed
    hit the sig if you could

  4. #4
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Dyl's Avatar
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    Re: The Point Of No Return

    yeah man I know where your coming from this was re-released was an old IE piece

    thanks for the feed
    Heard about the guy who fell off a skyscraper?
    On his way down past each floor,he kept saying to reassure himself
    So far so good.....
    So far so good.....
    So far so good.....

    But how you fall doesn't matter
    Its how you land

  5. #5
    as ain't Jamhuri's Avatar
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    Re: The Point Of No Return

    i think the poem developed nicely, to a suiting end. vivid image expressed in the operation room. It focused precisely on the same thing all through and wasn't random. thats a fete for me. i tend to mix too much thought and ideas ina single piece. nice piece man. I need to check em out more. plus death's a nice topic to write on.

  6. #6
    as ain't Jamhuri's Avatar
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  7. #7
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    Re: The Point Of No Return

    kinda lost me on the fish part ..some other parts too it wasn't bad kinda wierd actualy reading it the 2nd time came into focus more ...cool drop

  8. #8
    Newbie Daze Got SkiiLL's Avatar
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    Re: The Point Of No Return

    this is a well put together drop bro. very nice!
    Perfection at ITS BEST HahA!!!

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