One Way (6) vs. Username (6)

**Mariah** · September 8th, 2008, 12:28 AM

Due times:
Check in due Wednesday 11.59pm EST.
- if you don't check in by this time, and you DO end up posting, -2 votes.
Verses due by Friday 11.59pm EST. Yeah, that's eastern. not pacific.
Lateness = -2 votes even IF your opponent allows you to post late.
Max. extension = 24 hours, to be granted by your opponent.

Line limits:
10 min and 20 max. for regular battles. 16 min and 30 max in champ matches. If no line limit agreed, second battler to post must match first battler. But ultimately, first battler gets to set the line number by how much he posts.

**DGK** · September 8th, 2008, 03:44 AM

check.. round 2!

**one way** · September 8th, 2008, 05:02 PM

check, who are you?

**DGK** · September 10th, 2008, 06:37 PM

^ask ur girl bout me. lol

**DGK** · September 10th, 2008, 07:15 PM

so if I take this battle LITELY....its only cuz i'm battling a NO WEiGHT son!
cuz there really ain't nothing at stake here........... except u burning on 1.
u suck foo, ain't no1 intimated by this noob,
your intials are a foresight of ur future battles... 0 W. (zero wins)
ur verse is so light, i could snatch that shit,
and throw it like PAPER PLANES..
cuz when we peep ONE WAYS drops, ur punches r M.I.A. ( M.I.A. "PAPER PLANES")
^

when it comes 2 ur girl..this bitch is a whipped lil panzy
cuz u aint' NEVER WEAR THE PANTS in ya relationship.. like u live in a Nudist Colony!
fuckin noob, how the fuck u get in LLL JR.??? this bitch is wack G!
the only League u fit to drop in............ is 10 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA!

10... bitchez

**one way** · September 10th, 2008, 09:34 PM

Jesus Fuck, your verse was so far from hot it gave me a bad cough
The closest you’ll get to calling the shots is yelling while you jack off
I stumbled upon your pic, cause trust me you’ll never see me searching
You ugly fucker……You look like a fatter version of pee wee herman
You stay dense, if this was your day job you’d be struggling to pay rent
But if I gave you a penny for your thoughts you would at least make sense
Don’t give up on your dreams of being famous while you sit in the quiet night
You can spend the rest of your life in the limelight as I drown you in diet sprite
You really must have gave it your all like your actually expecting to take me
For real, I give you props on your verse, cause the whole thing looks shaky

**SoopSa** · September 10th, 2008, 09:39 PM

Originally Posted by Username

so if I take this battle LITELY....its only cuz i'm battling a NO WEiGHT son!
cuz there really ain't nothing at stake here........... except u burning on 1.
meh bad flip imo
u suck foo, ain't no1 intimated by this noob,
your intials are a foresight of ur future battles... 0 W. (zero wins)
k'ish
ur verse is so light, i could snatch that shit,
and throw it like PAPER PLANES..
cuz when we peep ONE WAYS drops, ur punches r M.I.A. ( M.I.A. "PAPER PLANES")
^

naw
when it comes 2 ur girl..this bitch is a whipped lil panzy
cuz u aint' NEVER WEAR THE PANTS in ya relationship.. like u live in a Nudist Colony!
nope
fuckin noob, how the fuck u get in LLL JR.??? this bitch is wack G!
the only League u fit to drop in............ is 10 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA!
meh no

10... bitchez

vs

Originally Posted by one way

Jesus Fuck, your verse was so far from hot it gave me a bad cough
The closest you’ll get to calling the shots is yelling while you jack off
lol
I stumbled upon your pic, cause trust me you’ll never see me searching
You ugly fucker……You look like a fatter version of pee wee herman
naw i seen his pics [nohomo] he don't look like peewee lmao
You stay dense, if this was your day job you’d be struggling to pay rent
But if I gave you a penny for your thoughts you would at least make sense
ROFL OMFGGGGGGGG DIRTEE AINT THE ONLY ONE
Don’t give up on your dreams of being famous while you sit in the quiet night
You can spend the rest of your life in the limelight as I drown you in diet sprite
lol good
You really must have gave it your all like your actually expecting to take me
For real, I give you props on your verse, cause the whole thing looks shaky
meh

vote one way better punches nicest line out the battle was the limelight one imo

V/1way

**Mauvais Loup** · September 10th, 2008, 09:55 PM

Hidden Content:

**Attack of the Muff** · September 10th, 2008, 10:21 PM

so if I take this battle LITELY....its only cuz i'm battling a NO WEiGHT son!
cuz there really ain't nothing at stake here........... except u burning on 1.
(good flip on an old concept)
u suck foo, ain't no1 intimated by this noob,
your intials are a foresight of ur future battles... 0 W. (zero wins)
(no..and stop explaining lines..all we have to do is look at his initials coz u said his initials are a foresight..jeez)
ur verse is so light, i could snatch that shit,
and throw it like PAPER PLANES..
cuz when we peep ONE WAYS drops, ur punches r M.I.A. ( M.I.A. "PAPER PLANES")
(shit doesnt even rhyme..and im lookin at a youtube vid to understand this wack ass punch..please refrain from this)
^

when it comes 2 ur girl..this bitch is a whipped lil panzy
cuz u aint' NEVER WEAR THE PANTS in ya relationship.. like u live in a Nudist Colony!
(the rhyming is horrible..panzy and colony is just ugly.. the concept is rather old as well..)
fuckin noob, how the fuck u get in LLL JR.??? this bitch is wack G!
the only League u fit to drop in............ is 10 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA!
(played as hell.. league/10,000 leagues under the sea has been done to death)

Jesus Fuck, your verse was so far from hot it gave me a bad cough
The closest you’ll get to calling the shots is yelling while you jack off
(LOL this made me chuckle..its old concept..but the way you worded it..masterful..lmfao @ yelling while jacking off hahahahah)
I stumbled upon your pic, cause trust me you’ll never see me searching
You ugly fucker……You look like a fatter version of pee wee herman
(eh not effective)
You stay dense, if this was your day job you’d be struggling to pay rent
But if I gave you a penny for your thoughts you would at least make sense
(sense cents wordplay is oooooooooooold penny for thoughts cliche olllllllllllllld)
Don’t give up on your dreams of being famous while you sit in the quiet night
You can spend the rest of your life in the limelight as I drown you in diet sprite
(LMFAO nice)
You really must have gave it your all like your actually expecting to take me
For real, I give you props on your verse, cause the whole thing looks shaky
(heh i see where the concept is goin.. i bet this flies over pplz heads at first)

v/one way man

the other guy was pretty bad

learn how to rhyme to where your concepts are crisp

not like you actually wrote your setup and went somewhere and copied some old ass concept and tried to force it in there..coz thats wat it looks like..lol ive been doin this shit forever and thats the vibes i get

oh and exclamation marks...dont make the punch more effective

wowzers

**The Archetype** · September 10th, 2008, 10:50 PM

Hidden Content:

**DGK** · September 11th, 2008, 12:22 AM

yall sum d/r up in here, fo realz.

**SoopSa** · September 11th, 2008, 12:28 AM

all honesty ya shit wasn't that hot compared to his and ya structure is wtf and a punch where you had to get a youtube clip just to explain...so wtf lol

no hate

**Wordz AhGod.** · September 11th, 2008, 09:09 AM

so if I take this battle LITELY....its only cuz i'm battling a NO WEiGHT son!
cuz there really ain't nothing at stake here........... except u burning on 1.
God noooo
u suck foo, ain't no1 intimated by this noob,
your intials are a foresight of ur future battles... 0 W. (zero wins)
alright concept... 1. your wording was terrible. you should have put O.w. first somewhere in your setup or something then maybe have something pointing it our to us. 2. Do not explain your punches like this unless we actually ask you to seperately. It looks retarded and it feels like your yelling at a chinese person coz you think it'll help them understand you better.
ur verse is so light, i could snatch that shit,
and throw it like PAPER PLANES..
cuz when we peep ONE WAYS drops, ur punches r M.I.A. ( M.I.A. "PAPER PLANES")
^

This is another no no.. your bar was utter garbage my dude, sorry but you did it to yourself. Dont post links either. I tried hyperlinks myself and I can post you the battle that I did it and I got all kinds of boooos. so take it from me its no good fam.
when it comes 2 ur girl..this bitch is a whipped lil panzy
cuz u aint' NEVER WEAR THE PANTS in ya relationship.. like u live in a Nudist Colony!
Lazy punch. you aint never did this..like if you where doing that. <--- that was all you said too me.. my brain shut itself off before your set up was done fam. I like to see your trying to make your setups relivent to the punch but you have remain within your flow and structure . you have one line over here and one line waaaayyy out there you know. it doesn't look or sound right. Try to spell out your words insted putting shit like ya' and u' and stuff of that nature. The way I see it, if your using all this shit and your line still looks kinda long, then its stretched beyond belief. Thats why use the spell it out method. Keeps me grounded pretty well to a structure.
fuckin noob, how the fuck u get in LLL JR.??? this bitch is wack G!
the only League u fit to drop in............ is 10 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA!
Flow was amizingly off, this league stuff is played, I did a nicer version of this a while back knowing it was played. This was to point out that no matter how played something my be, If you do it nice enough, people may still exept it. This is not to say that everyone will though.

vs

Jesus Fuck, your verse was so far from hot it gave me a bad cough
The closest you’ll get to calling the shots is yelling while you jack off
meh, wording and setup relevency problem here. whats your cough have to do with anything??
I stumbled upon your pic, cause trust me you’ll never see me searching
You ugly fucker……You look like a fatter version of pee wee herman
Here is your problem... we dont know what he looks like and you cant poste a picture with out his consent. So what do you do??? get creative and figuere it out. And dont try to get at him by simply calling him a pee wee hermin look alike. Thats lazy.
You stay dense, if this was your day job you’d be struggling to pay rent
But if I gave you a penny for your thoughts you would at least make sense
Meh, played in all ways but its your best attempt so far. setup was relevent, terrible played out and forced wordplay.
Don’t give up on your dreams of being famous while you sit in the quiet night
You can spend the rest of your life in the limelight as I drown you in diet sprite
weak
You really must have gave it your all like your actually expecting to take me
For real, I give you props on your verse, cause the whole thing looks shaky
noo

Well, My vote will go to One Way for simply having a better structure and making more understandable attempts at punches. You guys would be lucky to not get kicked out by now. Both of you have been battling here for about 3 consecutive weeks if not more and your still dropping the same shit that would probably get you a fare loss in FL. Your both also very smug towards each othere when you check in that I understand that if you had something lined up for each other but you both dropped just above ass but right below booo. Dont be discouraged, just know that LLL jr is not a place where you can keep going by what you been doing coz you been lucky so far. Every one loses, but its up to how you take this info in and use it that determines when it is your time.

VOne Way.

**B.Nesse** · September 11th, 2008, 11:50 AM

so if I take this battle LITELY....its only cuz i'm battling a NO WEiGHT son!
cuz there really ain't nothing at stake here........... except u burning on 1.
wow, this was so obvious
u suck foo, ain't no1 intimated by this noob,
your intials are a foresight of ur future battles... 0 W.
concept was alright, didn't connect tho cus that set up was off
ur verse is so light, i could snatch that shit,
and throw it like PAPER PLANES..
cuz when we peep ONE WAYS drops, ur punches r M.I.A.
nah
when it comes 2 ur girl..this bitch is a whipped lil panzy
cuz u aint' NEVER WEAR THE PANTS in ya relationship.. like u live in a Nudist Colony!
2nd line was od stretched and the concept was weak and executed poorly
fuckin noob, how the fuck u get in LLL JR.??? this bitch is wack G!
the only League u fit to drop in............ is 10 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA!
so off, and that concept is mad played out nothing original about it

vs

Jesus Fuck, your verse was so far from hot it gave me a bad cough
The closest you’ll get to calling the shots is yelling while you jack off
aight for an opener, but the set up didn't work
I stumbled upon your pic, cause trust me you’ll never see me searching
You ugly fucker……You look like a fatter version of pee wee herman
more of a pic battle punch here
You stay dense, if this was your day job you’d be struggling to pay rent
But if I gave you a penny for your thoughts you would at least make sense
i've seen shit like this before, therefore i see it as a played concept
Don’t give up on your dreams of being famous while you sit in the quiet night
You can spend the rest of your life in the limelight as I drown you in diet sprite
lol sounds corny but it made me laugh tho
You really must have gave it your all like your actually expecting to take me
For real, I give you props on your verse, cause the whole thing looks shaky
nah

v/one
username needs some work on concepts, and set ups, thats about it, because that's what killed him in his verse. one had some aight attempts, but neither had consistency, i only enjoyed one line from one but he's gotta work on freshness, nothing was fresh, but for the most part his verse hit harder when compared.

**Law.** · September 11th, 2008, 01:34 PM

You two battled the other week before didn't you? Take this as patrinising or a compliment, whatever .. but you two have a come a long way since that BAD battle. So, props for progressing.

Originally Posted by Username

so if I take this battle LITELY....its only cuz i'm battling a NO WEiGHT son!
cuz there really ain't nothing at stake here........... except u burning on 1.
Right, the delivery was good, honestly. The shame was the concept of that is MAD old man. Like, with the whole da feet/cents lines that are mocked if anyone uses one. The set up line was a bit weird, it probably doesn't really mak a heap of difference but you opened up a bit oddly.

u suck foo, ain't no1 intimated by this noob,
your intials are a foresight of ur future battles... 0 W. (zero wins)
Better. Personal, though not that much STING.

ur verse is so light, i could snatch that shit,
and throw it like PAPER PLANES..
cuz when we peep ONE WAYS drops, ur punches r M.I.A. ( M.I.A. "PAPER PLANES")
^

Usually (although I've used pic/quotes before) if you need a link to explain a punch its a sign you shouldn't use it. So a waste of a bar .. this was shit.

when it comes 2 ur girl..this bitch is a whipped lil panzy
cuz u aint' NEVER WEAR THE PANTS in ya relationship.. like u live in a Nudist Colony!
Ha, wittier. Again though, not much sting. Your concepts aren't too bad but you should used that line to make him sound more like a bitch than you have done.

fuckin noob, how the fuck u get in LLL JR.??? this bitch is wack G!
the only League u fit to drop in............ is 10 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA!
Same as before, concept was ok, but lacked strength.

10... bitchez

Think more about your punches. I sorta get the impression that you are working too hard on trying to make a good wordplay in your punches. Obviously, it's a good thing to have but what you have improved upon you've almost lost being direct at one way. This wasn't trash but it was a bit weak. try & be simple, witty & usually that basic but smart style makes a decent verse. Your improving though.

Originally Posted by one way

Jesus Fuck, your verse was so far from hot it gave me a bad cough
The closest you’ll get to calling the shots is yelling while you jack off
It did make me laugh but the wording let the concept down. I mean calling the shots doesn't work with the end of that punch aswell as say "the only shots you call .. is where you want your b/friend's siemen". I'm not telling you what to do, but i think that would be funnier IMO.

I stumbled upon your pic, cause trust me you’ll never see me searching
You ugly fucker……You look like a fatter version of pee wee herman
I haven't seen his pic, maybe if I did I'd laugh but this seems a bit too simple. Looks like it lacks thought & was just a filler punch.

You stay dense, if this was your day job you’d be struggling to pay rent
But if I gave you a penny for your thoughts you would at least make sense
Played, but your getting the idea of linking up w/play

Don’t give up on your dreams of being famous while you sit in the quiet night
You can spend the rest of your life in the limelight as I drown you in diet sprite
ha, thought this was ite.

You really must have gave it your all like your actually expecting to take me
For real, I give you props on your verse, cause the whole thing looks shaky
Similiar to comment of the punch above the previous. Highly played but your linking concepts up better.

One Way took this.

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