Dollar Circulate

[JLK]

I'm the 2nd verse btw.

A friend and I plan on doing a track each week. We're hoping the feedback from each week will help us improve on the next until we both get to where we want. So don't hold back!

Personally, I'm still not satisfied at all with my delivery. Any advice on developing that would be nice. Telling me who I sound similar to would be a big help. It's probably just a matter of practice though, which is why we're doing this.

Anyways, no hook, just 2 verses back to back.

[sc]http://soundcloud.com/thejlk/dollar-circulate/s-VL25N[/sc]


http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...259/index.html
http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...402/index.html

[Blackflags]

I edited in your Soundcloud player. Please read around and discover these things before you post. We prefer you post something directly to the page, i.E. an embedded player, if it can be done. Just saves time, and people will walk away from having to click links mate. Anyways, thanks for the links, just giving you a heads up!

[JLK]

thanks but when i did it i used the [SC][/SC] tags it didn't show up in my post so i edited it

[ShaDoWLesS]

Never understand why people post their lyrics, is this a new thing? Anyway, not bad here. Beat is kinda cool, reminds me a bit of something that could be in an Adult Swim bump for some reason. Flow is pretty good, you got some swag but not overdoing it, just the right amount for something like this. vocal quality could be improved though. Not bad though man, keep doing our thing.

Please return the feedback homie
http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...402/index.html

[L.way]

Ight, as you already know, the quality isn't amazing, neither is mine either, xD. Your lyrics weren't bad, they can improve in that aspect by just adding on to the fundamentals, wordplay, metaphors, etc. That said, I kind of liked the second dude better in all honesty, better voice y delivery I felt, overall greater mic presence. You guys have determination, which is always nice, you'll get there guys. Just keep practicing. Check me out as well.
http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...327/index.html

[Rishi P]

checking this...1st dude flow ain't too bad sounds a bit shaky though...mix could be cleaner throw some dubs in there vocals sound a bit thin....guess this u? you coming in better again EQ them vocals a bit....yeah u def have a better flow and more comfortable....nice man...nice lyrics/vocab

overall you def outshined your boy keep it up

hit me back please
http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...78#post8359578

[J-min]

i like the approach the first dude is coming with !!
2nd dude is alot cleaner with his flow
the quality could do with a better mix try work on that otherwise ur wating ya time making tracks every week if they are all bad qulity ( no hate just some advice)

overall ur bringing it keep at it

rtf http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...306/index.html

[DeathChamberz]

ROund 1 FLow isn't smooth a little choppy used

Round 2 Basic cadence and the voice could be doubled or add bass like the rhymes used

Refeed
http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...912/index.html

[JLK]

just to clarify, i'm the 2nd verse. thanks for all the feed. definitely gonna take more consideration into the mix next time, even if it takes more than a week. like j-min said, i don't wanna be wasting my time

i'll refeed everyone tomorrow

[I-M-E]

yeahh, first dudes not bad, he does sound a bit shaky as rishi p said, but i like his voice and can see him getting more comfortable sounding...your verse was better all around, you sound more comftorable, flow was a tad shaky too but not much....good beat too, woulda liked more to this track but its good for what it is

[itsToby]

1st verse had a dope feel to it but flow was a little off, the 2nd verse had a nice flow to it rhymes weren't too bad but could be improved with some switch ups, metaphors and what not. only thing that really concerned me was the quality of both verses, try to mix and master it better to a sound you feel would be high quality, maybe its your sound system but i don't know. I'm not good with mixing and mastering either though so were in the same boat. but overall good track

RTF http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...671/index.html