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Thread: Raps

  1. #1
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Smog's Avatar
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    Raps

    It's all about effort no doubt I'm an expert,
    since I quit slamming Guinness stout till my head hurt,
    noisy mind, thinkin out louds how my pen works,
    I'm the type a cat that can't stand to take a lecture,
    so I sat down n pushed the teachers buttons to fuckin test her,
    the only things I learned in school was how to flex words
    like I injected my lines wit growth hormones so my rhymes would get girth,
    connect verbs wit nouns n adjectives n it gets worse,
    WOW! i never imagined it would then merge
    wit sounds to make the best verse come out more perfect- ER than any,
    many try but I been runnin rap so long that my legs hurt,
    excer-sizing minds u should a stretched first
    , lookin for a stress cure, suggest u let ur neck jerk
    n bob ur head to the best heard emcee ever since birth,
    my folks moved westward I was supposed to take a right but made a left turn, n remained where I stepped first,
    east heights to please mics likes surprising the wife with a guess purse,
    new mex I rep like a bench press to get ur chest perked,
    I expect bursts but get less than I expect so I guess i will accept earths mess n give a gesture
    see these middle fingers? That's right I won't rest until I get Merked....

  2. #2
    Cypher Sadist
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    Re: Raps

    You did a good job of keeping the multi-scheme afloat, but it did hit a few rough patches towards the end, where it seemed long-winded rather than articulate. I like the overall rhyme scheme though. It's cool, the structure drives it well, and you got way putting your words together. Overall, a modest effort from what I see. Good key-style shizzle.



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  3. #3
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    Re: Raps

    @Smog I don't usually like the rhymes without meaning but somehow I liked this... I caught the flow immediately and caught like an Eminem off the hook I just wanna spit and flow vibe. Sometime when I flow I leave it a day or two and come back then piece it together. I mean I don't have any awards or nothing on here so I ain't saying I am all perfect and shit BUT I think drafts might help you out too. something to consider newbie.

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