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Thread: Two from Scripture, One for a Stripper

  1. #1
    Whatever, Fuck You HighEngineChief's Avatar
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    Two from Scripture, One for a Stripper

    Call me Ishmael







    New Troll, Same Troll Mistakes



    I feel like fuck you every day another middle finger waving in your coldcasefile fACES
    I’m a dragon and a racist in a kukluxklan Mercedes mowing down your wetback babies
    You can’t stop me now from saying any vile and depraved thing I can think up in a daydream
    I turn on the tube and take in every breath from Mother Satan said, “Boy this world is amazing,
    Like a little blue pill. You thought I wasn’t gon’ take it?!” Jack my dick in masters basement
    Rub my red hot balls against the cold steel bars of this old cage it’s been a long two thousand
    Years and I’ve been waiting on the day I could spring from the ground and take drift clear up
    Into space to turn around at the whole human race and watch Poseidon’s whirlpool drown em
    Hitting up your Twitter daily tell your sister I’m a rapist in a cosby sweater crouching
    In the bushes taking pictures of her naked in the shower I might traipse in through the window
    Mush her face against the tile and tell that bitch if she don’t pop that pussy open I’ll use pliers
    Caked in clown makeup and smiles in the back yard with candycoatedxanys waiting for a child
    On Facebook posting comments why your mother died of cancer is cause Jesus hates the Irish
    Dancing on her grave in Hammer pants and I could go for miles bitch I think I just ate a tire
    I think my brain is made of fire know my heart is made of iron I might drown inside the tub
    I can feel the water rising and my double cup runneth over the drugs just keep on piling
    And my nose is lined in dust and I can hear my daughter crying don’t you kill my buzz enough
    I’m on Twitter talking violence fell asleep inside a stripper I got glitter on my eyelids
    DM everyone some dick pics and the dicks ain’t even mine bitch but I’m still gon’ bust my nut
    And my daughter is still crying I don’t ever get to sleep I’m swerving all over the highway
    Needles stuffed between the seats tweeting don’t text me while you’re driving
    All I see is TV screens boy all I see is blank-faced status changes floating through the mire
    Try to poke you so you like them that shit’s aimless all I want to do is stoke another fire
    If my daughter don’t shut up I’ll knock that hoe up out her diapers what’s a cobra to a viper
    It don’t matter what you call me all that matters is I’ll bite you photoshop my dick inside you
    I don’t know how else to be and I got pictures in my mind I don’t want no one else to see
    You block my ass I uninvite you fucking vampire or lycan every diatribe I ever tweet
    Retweet my shit again I’ll beat your grandma ass dead in the street
    S.O.E! S.O.E! Bitch I shit on everything I’ll hotlinebling your hot teenage dyslexic niece
    Baby jesus daddy is just tryna get his dick wet please stop fucking screaming for at least
    Three fucking minutes bitch I mean it let me finish on her titties pop a bottle let it breathe
    I’m in my feelings get the fuck up out of here and let me be we talking business let me preach
    Joy far beyond heaven’s reach is in this pill and once I sniff it god have mercy on your children
    All I see is TV screens boy all I see is un-dead filth still staring down and so bewildered
    At their phones I’m the abyss that’s starring back at you on twitter creeping on your little sister
    Get defensive and I’ll snap that bitches neck in sharp ass splinters and let my sharks dab up in her
    I’ma lock her in the car and leave the engine on up in it so she chokes on gas emissions
    Long live the trolls and now we’re burning all our bridges fuck compassion and forgiveness
    Give me fascism and bitches I’ma fuck your little sister lick her asshole like it’s dinner
    Your pussy is cold and rancid in fact it has colon cancer your pussy look like the Gremlins
    Your hole got a rope that drop down a cave where MC Ren is with Flavor Flav playing spades
    Against DougE Fresh and that fine white bitch from Ace of Base your pussy feel like detention
    Everyone on twitter knows that I’m the one you don’t mess with I will take a Gr-r-r-eat
    Shit on every one of y’alls breakfast I’m the son of God sent to give you all your last lesson
    You ain’t never meant shit to anybody but your selves and there is nothing you can say
    To stop the rising up from Hell that rips into your mortal plane and swallows back all of you

    devils...



    (Come here! Didn't I tell your little ass to
    Shut up while daddy's talking?)



    this most
    excellent canopy, the air,—look you, this brave
    o’erhanging firmament, this majestical roof fretted
    with golden fire,—why, it appears no other thing to
    me than a foul and pestilent congregation of vapours.

    —Hamlet, Act II, Scene II






    Thinking aloud in my head hope my ghost’s don’t get stirred back up out of their beds
    Hope the penance for memory mounts me in pieces and all my ex’s get their own pound of flesh
    please take down the mirrors don’t want to reflect— on all of these feelings I long to forget
    Calling my name never answer my cell send it straight to voicemail let them haunt me again
    In the morning still tossing still lost in regret and I wish that this couch was a coffin instead
    Of these afternoon naps I’m exhausted with rest and I envy the dust of it’s unconscious depth
    What am I now but a nauseous effect of a cesspool of bones that belong to the dead
    What am I now but a parcel a spec a remarkable breath of the sea rising off of the deck
    Like a dream drifting from one lost thought to the next is this gleaming, brittle gossamer wet
    With the tears of the spider or that of the fly; How in the hell am I caught in this web?

    How do I escape from mistakes when I’m always shitfaced and my brain’s up in flames
    Have to suffer these same faces day after day every page that I turn is a slave that was made
    From the grains of the Earth that was caged from it’s birth in a grave we call Fate
    Till nothing’s left of me but the shame and codeine and my spirit sinks into a state of dismay
    I just want to wake up tell me it’s a dream nothing’s ever what it seems on this stage but we play
    Out our parts either way for a sea of empty seats in the dark till curtain comes to take us away
    Looking round I don’t know what to make of this place and the specters of faded out days
    That lay low on the world like a venomous snake all my angels resemble the devil in shades
    Someone turn down the treble and turn up the bass shake the world till she trembles and breaks
    In my hand like a delicate egg the deadlands of my yesterdays wet with decay

    Goddess of Love, tell me a lie— I put my heart out and left it to die
    I plucked the stars from the depths of the sky to hold ransom from God until heaven is mine
    All that I have left to measure is time, minutes and seconds keep stepping in line
    Close up my soul I can’t let them inside nor hours whom devour the treasures I hide
    Mementos tossed right down the cleft of my mind to forever remember me by
    Beautiful petals that stick to the slime of this wrinkled old branch with dim embers of light
    That poke out of the darkness and enter the eye; get rid of this mirror reflecting demise
    Let the minutes and hours and seconds collide until Chronos washes up dead with the tide
    All these things are but sweats in the night that pass swift as a chill then slip under the knife
    And once stuffed in that pine we go on with our lies and pretend it’s a wonderful life

    Everything’s transient love will subside, all of my family and loved ones will cry
    All of the cameras will cut to the sky, all these illusion’s won’t cover my crimes
    All of your searching and nothing to find but a hollowed out person you wanted to pry
    But the pictures you swiped were inverted, you’ll never know the true substance of I
    All of these versions you’ve learned over time are mere apparitions of a love undefined
    Something that rhymes in a jumbled up world where our tongues have been tied
    We’re nothing alike put up fronts with each other and suffer the lies we abruptly contrive
    In the hope that maybe we can puncture this line that divides us all up like we’re swine
    All of the beauty of loving and dying and living and fucking and running and flying
    O Muse! Can I keep but just one to be mine— Erato! Erato! tell me a lie





    My ceiling high her top stay low those late nights drinking in the club
    I miss those shots, ain’t got no scope- I been thinking bout your love
    The hearts your pussy poppin’ broke and all the feelings in this cup
    I mixed in a few drops of hope cause me and you still need that drug
    Girl park that ass up in my lap all night and let the meter run
    I’m dropping dollars, mop this floor I know you always clean it up
    She sit down on my face while I’m asleep now all my dreams are crushed
    She cum alive I drink the beads at once from her wet leaves the flood
    I hear heart beats the drum kicks out my teeth girl I can’t eat that much
    The heavens open sweet and sunken deep into the setting sun
    And stepping to the stage this evening must be Venus, heels and lust
    And her pierced tongue run through my mind two wet ear drums
    I’m too inclined her tulip winds my spine thus beauty leaves me stunned
    Convinced that I still need her touch so every dollar seems as just
    As every other single one I throw on stage to see her strut to me for once
    Instead of chasing after all this pussy just to taste again its beaten dust

    Don’t think I’ll ever leave this club

    - - - Updated - - -

    I'll be dropping links here

  2. #2
    Landed Emily's Avatar
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    Re: Two from Scripture, One for a Stripper

    Wow, unreal piece, so long. Looking forward to the read.
    Not sure if you've fed anything hec, but if you have,
    can you do me a favour and drop the links here?
    You've got another 48 hours.
    I'm giving everyone the same amount of time.
    Last edited by Emily; November 23rd, 2016 at 12:43 AM


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  3. #3
    La Costa Nostra Late Bloom's Avatar
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    Re: Two from Scripture, One for a Stripper

    right this was a chill piece.. it was long as fuck though.... kind of had trouble keeping my interest.... also a lot of the lines seemed stretched and the rhyme scheme was hard to follow at points...... i liked how you put this together though..... however i didnt understand the hamlet quote and what that had to to do with the piece... it seemed like it was about some sortve stalker kind of character who was just looking for some pussy really.... i liked the way you ended this piece with the i will never leave this club bit..... that was kind of interesting i guess.... anyways keep dropping only thing i could say is maybe try and write less there was too much going on in this picture...... something shorter would have been better imo...... anyways good work though...
    a labyrinth of power.....

  4. #4
    God Fist Spoken Deity's Avatar
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    Re: Two from Scripture, One for a Stripper

    Well, this piece has a lot of voices--sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't. The lines seemed quite stretched to me, which means you lost the fluidity of the rhyme scheme. But a number of stanzas are excellent. The particular two that stick are right below the Hamlet quote. Good rhyming, really clear images that have intent. I think what I generally misunderstand the switching of voices, which seems intentional, except it shifts sometimes in the middle of a stanza without any real reason.
    While the size and scope of this is impressive, you are redundant. I think it would be worth seeing how you could cut this down, and perhaps be a bit more precise with your images and ideas, and navigate just what you're trying to communicate throughout. Those few really clean stanzas I mentioned could well be the starting point of editing.
    One thing I should point out: writing about sex is rarely sexy. In fact, it often oozes awkwardly played romantic or sentimental imager. As a whole, you managed to make imagery about sex sexy, and that's actually a difficult task. I applaud you for totally nailing that one. [/pun]

  5. #5
    Landed Emily's Avatar
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    Re: Two from Scripture, One for a Stripper

    links provided via pm


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