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Thread: Tea Time

  1. #1
    bobericc _Lyrics's Avatar
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    Tea Time



    Tea time.
    You can see the truth as most people do
    Its a tea to brew from a bunch of leaves that's loose
    Steep a few, chill and stop to think
    An elevated thrill on a Himalayan hill with some Darjeeling
    Lessons that were seeking, destined as we're drinking
    Thirsts were quenching, served for breakfast like the English
    Twisted with a green tint, taste what's worth a sip
    An amazing murky mix from an ancient herbalist
    Brains can spill over, like shaking a soda
    A voice from the froth in boiling pots shaped like pagodas
    Prayed to the lotus like complacent marauders
    Making a party outta what's gave to the Harbor
    Waves on the water, tides meet where I be
    Find me with my mind free, tai chi with some chai tea..
    Icy like power over will, a founding source of skill
    Weakest villains, streaming systems, Powdered or distilled..

    Cut from our apathy
    Our Thoughts are a batch of leaves
    Our pot is a galaxy
    Poaring a cup of reality


    Cant handle me carelessly, I'm bubbling up
    hot to the touch, believe youll need a cup in a cup.
    Little leaves rolled to silver needles
    Many mingle in A big world of Zhen pearls and Clever people..
    In the carribean with Asosee and a heart of a lion,
    roads onto zion with Ag and positive ions.
    Mystical with Chemist functions, heads are sunken
    Set to flow with Ethanol as their Liquid courage
    Kombucha goes to ya, betcha thirsty in a sec
    Smiling cause I'm Dialed in like early internet..
    Tips are grown to be pruned, Never alone in your use
    Staring at your glass- Spirits of the past in ceremonial rooms
    Hopes for the youth, renewing goals
    But see you'll be beautiful with a bit of Eleuthero..
    Imagine this fairy tale, A passion you feel is real
    Never an end to heavenly blends of Jasmine and chamomile
    GreaterDesignGrowers.com

    Im not a rapper, im a gardener

  2. #2
    bobericc _Lyrics's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    boston
    Age
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    Posts
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    64-44
    GreaterDesignGrowers.com

    Im not a rapper, im a gardener

  3. #3
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Venom's Avatar
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    Re: Tea Time

    Dude this was top notch. I don't have anything I feel needs to be improved on this, I think it does what it needs too. The technical aspect of it is on point, it's thought provoking and smooth reading so props man. One thing I will say is it left me wishing it had been longer.

  4. #4
    Super Grand Heru SELF ACTIVATE's Avatar
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    Re: Tea Time

    Tea time.
    You can see the truth as most people do
    Its a tea to brew from a bunch of leaves that's loose
    Steep a few, chill and stop to think
    An elevated thrill on a Himalayan hill with some Darjeeling
    Lessons that were seeking, destined as we're drinking
    Thirsts were quenching, served for breakfast like the English
    Twisted with a green tint, taste what's worth a sip
    An amazing murky mix from an ancient herbalist
    I instinctively wanted to break this verse into more parts. However, the fluidity of your flow was so pronounced it smoothly whisked me downstream like the tranquil current of a river. The way you streamed from image to image while adding meaningful references was impressive and enhanced the overall quality of the content. The entire quoted portion above was not only knowledgeable in subject matter, but also creative in illustration.

    Brains can spill over, like shaking a soda
    A voice from the froth in boiling pots shaped like pagodas
    Prayed to the lotus like complacent marauders
    Making a party outta what's gave to the Harbor
    Waves on the water, tides meet where I be
    Find me with my mind free, tai chi with some chai tea..
    Icy like power over will, a founding source of skill
    Weakest villains, streaming systems, Powdered or distilled..
    This verse is so psychedelic and trippy, yet at the same time very Zen and calming. The imagery is off the charts and the vocabulary you've chosen to employ is absolutely perfect given the topic.

    Cut from our apathy
    Our Thoughts are a batch of leaves
    Our pot is a galaxy
    Poaring a cup of reality
    At this point I'm thinking iowaska or mushroom tea.

    I like the way you've cosmically described in a whimsically beautiful manner.

    Cant handle me carelessly, I'm bubbling up
    hot to the touch, believe youll need a cup in a cup.
    Little leaves rolled to silver needles
    Many mingle in A big world of Zhen pearls and Clever people..
    In the carribean with Asosee and a heart of a lion,
    roads onto zion with Ag and positive ions.
    Ag as in silver? Anyway, I dig the Rasta Man vibes you got going on here. I find it interesting how you have touched on so many different cultures all while narrating a shared experience. Thus far I've noticed the English, Oriental, and now West Indian influences in this verse. Dope and seamless stuff my dude.

    Mystical with Chemist functions, heads are sunken
    Set to flow with Ethanol as their Liquid courage
    Kombucha goes to ya, betcha thirsty in a sec
    Smiling cause I'm Dialed in like early internet..
    Tips are grown to be pruned, Never alone in your use
    Staring at your glass- Spirits of the past in ceremonial rooms
    Hopes for the youth, renewing goals
    But see you'll be beautiful with a bit of Eleuthero..
    Imagine this fairy tale, A passion you feel is real
    Never an end to heavenly blends of Jasmine and chamomile
    Just dope.

    Everything about it. The feel, the tone, it's imagery, the metaphors, references, language, flow, and the imagination it possessed. This was a wild ride worthy of Mad Hatter recognition. Consider it nom'ed.

    Peace...

  5. #5
    Coal to the furnace Cody Phoenix's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2015
    Posts
    925
    Awards OM HOF

    Re: Tea Time

    Quote Originally Posted by _Lyrics View Post



    Absolutely love this photo, holy shit. Great choice.

    Tea time.
    You can see the truth as most people do
    Its a tea to brew from a bunch of leaves that's loose
    Steep a few, chill and stop to think
    An elevated thrill on a Himalayan hill with some Darjeeling

    This rhyme, the inner rhyme, the cadence within it. All of this sounded as if you wrote it and said it out loud to perfect its meter. Great writing here, Lyrics... You're constantly elevating and I love it.

    Lessons that were seeking, destined as we're drinking
    Thirsts were quenching, served for breakfast like the English
    Twisted with a green tint, taste what's worth a sip
    An amazing murky mix from an ancient herbalist

    This is straight up fire rhyming and I love the consistency with inner syllabylic rhyme and working metaphoric language, this is what separates good from great, small writing elements implemented like this.

    Brains can spill over, like shaking a soda
    A voice from the froth in boiling pots shaped like pagodas
    Prayed to the lotus like complacent marauders
    Making a party outta what's gave to the Harbor

    Consistent. Crisp language, sparks with creativity. I enjoy your use of words, the set ups for the next rhyme. It's unique, different. It's you being you.

    Waves on the water, tides meet where I be
    Find me with my mind free, tai chi with some chai tea..
    Icy like power over will, a founding source of skill
    Weakest villains, streaming systems, Powdered or distilled..

    Second line didn't flow will, sounded awkward. This could've easily been fixed with different word choices... It just has too many words, gotta follow the word count sometimes.

    Cut from our apathy
    Our Thoughts are a batch of leaves
    Our pot is a galaxy
    Poaring a cup of reality

    *Pouring (lol)


    Cant handle me carelessly, I'm bubbling up
    hot to the touch, believe youll need a cup in a cup.

    This shouldn't work, but it did. I like this. Favorite line.

    Little leaves rolled to silver needles
    Many mingle in A big world of Zhen pearls and Clever people..

    This rhyme would only work through colloquial-like accent, which I can do. I like this. Sounds good.

    In the carribean with Asosee and a heart of a lion,
    roads onto zion with Ag and positive ions.

    I don't get this? The second line, I mean.

    Mystical with Chemist functions, heads are sunken
    Set to flow with Ethanol as their Liquid courage
    Kombucha goes to ya, betcha thirsty in a sec
    Smiling cause I'm Dialed in like early internet..

    Ha dialed like early internet, this was a good part.... I can't get over the amount of creativity you have. This is an awesome piece, dude.

    Tips are grown to be pruned, Never alone in your use
    Staring at your glass- Spirits of the past in ceremonial rooms
    Hopes for the youth, renewing goals
    But see you'll be beautiful with a bit of Eleuthero..
    Imagine this fairy tale, A passion you feel is real
    Never an end to heavenly blends of Jasmine and chamomile


    I can see why you're a text drop mod, this was dope... the closer hit on a soft rhyming note with eloquent language.
    Overall, this was worth a read. Thank you for sharing. I can't really critique those with firm understandings of topicals such as yourself.... I do however wish you had more linear tangents in your pieces. I'd love to see you do a story-line like piece, something on the level of an epic. Fantasy, etc. Again, good work... bump!!!!!!!
    I'm a depressed happy cunt. Don't fuck with me. I love you, but I'm crazy.[/I]


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