The Mag - LLL Week 7

[King]

Intro


I got two things I want to talk about quick before getting into the mag. First of all, the voting last week was horrendous. I'm as guilty as anyone, even though I wasn't signed in, but we all have to do a better job of getting votes in. Idc if you're not sure about the winner, make a call and drop the vote. We all put in a decent amount of time writing bars, no one wants to do that and get 3 fucking votes.

More importantly, your fearless leader Blue needed this week off after getting some bad news and having to deal with some family shit. Dude has put A LOT of effort into this season, while battling and CHAMPING. And it's been a dope ass season on top of that. AANND he also volunteered $250 for the season champion, which is huge. I'ma need him to confirm that he's still doing that but that's easily the biggest cash prize I've seen in a text league. So big shout out to @Blue Bayou , show some love in the comments. On to the mag...



Week 6 Revews


Josh S vs Ronin

This was a decent battle. Josh had some good concepts just didn't execute on them all. His opener was cool, Spyro was dope. If he keeps working on his wording he's could be a problem by seasons end.. Ronin dropped a solid verse, his opener nameplay was pretty dope. Flexability too. In the end voters thought it was enough to get his third win in a row and a contenders match this week.


Ryno vs JEM

I think this was a little closer than the votes suggested. JEM has been steadily improving, he's another dude that just needs to stick with it and he'll start winning consistently. I thought his first two bars were his best, attacking Ryno for the biting accusations. After that he had some decent concepts but the execution was off. Ryno had a more polished verse overall. His first 3 bars were cool, after that I thought he fell off a little. Still enough for the W.


Blas vs Joe Boston

Blas had a decent verse imo. Futurama flip was dope, after that he had some solid jabs. If he starts wording bars more aggressively he could be a problem. Joe had a cool opening current even punch but I don't think he had another one that really landed like that. A couple good concepts just needed to take different angles with them. Voters went with Blas here.


Contenders Match
Dominate vs Barcotic

This was a dope battle. Barcotic had a dope verse, no doubt. He was pretty consistent and had a few really dope bars like Straya, odometer, and giant spiders. The ending of his verse tapered off a little but overall still a solid verse, problem was that Dom came with the heat. Laundering, hedge funds, colony were all dope. MIC was a hard personal. His opener was ok, his closer was played, outside of that it was a real consistent hard hitting verse. Bar got DQ'd but voters seem to all go Doms way regardless. Good battle fellas.


Championship Match
Blue Bayou vs Exalted

This was a pretty solid champ match. Blue was consistent as usual. Had a nice opener, tag team champs was dope personal, and the game of thrones joint was dope too. Other than those I think he had some really solid jabs and a couple ok punches like Life Support. Definitely beatable and Ex did drop a good verse but had some wordy lines like his opener and a couple misses. I thought Benthic was creative and dope, I thought WWE was cool, definitely a solid verse just not enough this time around. Blue ended up winning with a few votes and Ex forfeiting.





Interview w/ Exhalted

What's good mang? You've had a dope season so far, couple tough losses to Blue and Dom but strong showings in both. Have you battled in LLL before this season?

I've battled a couple times in 2015/16 and participated in a cypher. But tbh - I trolled here mostly bc people were PM'ing me on NCs at the time to come over.


What would you say your best battle was? On any site. Post a link if you got it.

Ehh I'd say they were pic battles w/ kungfugrip, unique, fracture, etc on BW which is gone. That's David Lama first site before Netcees for those who're clueless. 06-09 era.
I remember having a pic battle w/ Username on RM in 2006.. it was a big deal at the time bc he was a known vet & i was pretty much an unknown. He won but everyone gave props on my verse & from there I moved up the ranks. The battle got like 3 or 4 pages of votes iirc.
On NC I would say my battle royale verses in Orcs tourney or my Letterman no show verse lol.
On NC 1.0 my verses for sound & beyond which lost too.

So why did you forfeit the champ match instead of letting it play out? or was it just the lack of votes? Which was wack af.

Nah, I wasn't happy w/ my verse i guess. Idk, I literally worded everything last minute. I seemed to have jumbled a few bars but i thought the speedrun & green lines got slept on tbh. Eh, i rly didn't feel like writing. There are just days i can't be bothered & don't care to think bars up.


Anyone you're looking forward to battling this season that you haven't?

Everyone I haven't battled. I want one w/ Barcs Lawmower

Last question, what are your top 3 movies all time? Random af I know, I ran out of questions lmao.

Three randoms:
Forest Gump
Terminator 2
Good Will Hunting



Shout outs or comments...

Shouts out to Blue that his fam situation improves.

Interview w/ Lay Doubt

Lay Doubt returns once again. Whats good man, how's it feel to be back in the mix again?


What upppp broski! It's cool man. I've noticed a few faggots here and there, but hopefully with enough chat thread roast session they'll see the light and convert to heterosexuality. Prolly not tho.


How does this season compare to LLL when you were active in your opinion? Talent wise but also just in general.


It's definitely different. I think the top talent is more advanced and evolved than it was then for sure as far as conceptually and the overall crafting of their verses, but that's to be expected over a decade later. Then again I've also peeped verses from dudes who def would have been relegated to LLL Jr. til they stepped their game up.

As far as in general, it was just a totally different time for text battling back then. RB felt like its own little world, and there was always so much other shit going on site-wide that personals were usually never-ending on a weekly basis. You can def tell it's a bunch of older cats now who are grown up with careers and families and shit, who just come directly into the LLL forum to fuck around and challenge themselves with putting together a verse every week.

I'm honestly surprised/impressed that this league is still going, when you look at all the other ones that are dead and buried. You got whole ass rap sites that cease to exist, shit's wild. Who ever thought RM would get snuffed out someday.. you know?


Anyone you're looking forward to getting the opportunity to battling this season?


Whoever can get it. These Orc and Aero kids seem to be under the impression that they're the MJ and Pippen of text battling but I'm not convinced. I would say Blas and Kill Spree purely on the basis that they're both obnoxious lil pussyboys who suck dick to cure boredom, but I think smashing on special needs people is frowned upon and can even be accompanied by criminal enhancements from the DA.




I actually joined this site for the first time in 99 when it was basically brand new. When did you first get on a battle site and what was your name? And how long did it take you to catch on and start winning consistently?


My first battle site was the one you're reading this on in late 2004 when I was 15. First name I believe was "Genocide" (yeah I know lmao) and it took me maybe two or three months of fucking around in FL and LLL Jr. until I got myself into LLL (season 2 or 3?) and pretty much had immediate success thereafter and was always competitive.




Last question, do you watch game of thrones? If yes, what did you think of the premier? If not. .....like how tf can you not watch it?

I actually don't. I'm not a big fan of having to go out and get a subscription to some other shit just for one show. The thought irritates me. I'm actually blazing through Dexter right now on Netflix and I know I'm late here (like I will be with GOT someday) but shit's super dope and I highly recommend to anyone who hasn't peeped it all this time, like I never had.


Shout outs and comments

Shout out Warriors for blowing the biggest lead in NBA postseason history SMH yall shoulda seen my reactions while watching the waning moments of that game.

Shout out Spit for hitting me on the book and suggesting I get back on this bitch. Not sure I ever would have otherwise.

Shout out to muthafuckin King for the interview nod.

Shout out to everyone on here who's NOT a flagrant faggot week in and week out.

Chuck a deuce, hoe! Peace.

No Show Shine


Spit vs Resin

Resin is annnncient.

damn that was a lonngggg time ago lol .. i was a beast back then

haha I been around forever, this is def the most active I been in a decade

'Nuff said.

I gotta lawyer up.. bitches get sue happy when I'm rappin to harm.
you better sign a waiver. it's ur goodbye tour & I'm snapping your arms
fucking low life, ur worthless.. supposed to be a legend in time
we gave you credit, then discover your skills been fraudulent & declined
I'm gunnin hard, better suit up.. don't bring your regular bummage
& if you decide to come barrel make fun of that ugly keg of a stomach.
I'm the God of Gods. see it's all about respect & I make the fees
the fact is, I'm Odin if you don't paypal I'm likely to break your knees.
Res I stay fresh to death, I'm the best to rep & you can't deny I bring it.
tbh, your style's an old rustic that shatters as soon as you try & swing it
shit's tragic.. ur wack now, get murdered if I EVER see ya post again
on my Johnson & lost your Magic. time to step down NBA ghost again.
bitch bow to me, u really don't wanna lock horns when tensions peaking
cuz everyone agrees.. I'm the bull anytime they consensus beefing.
you're a fucking actor. you ain't hard & the beating I supply smarts
this is your IMDB, & ur getting a castrating that'll have you denied parts
I make this shit look easy.. so it's really no surprise you don't like me
cuz you know I'm fire & when you catch this elemental breakdown is likely.
this nerd's wrecked, the impact to his bird chest got it straight collapsing
he's so delicacy him break & crow's what resinate for bragging.



4TC.




Power Rankings


5. Ronin

After a slow start and multiple DQ's Ronin has won 3 straight and has a chance to earn a champ match this week.


4. Barcotic

Tough loss last week but he's always a threat to make a run. As long as he doesn't get DQ'd


3. Spitacular

Lost a couple close ones with Blue and Dom but he's ran through everyone else. Definitely looking for the rematch with Blue


2. Dominate

Dom is a real close second here. To be completely honest I think he dropped a better verse than Blue last week, only reason he didn't get first is because of the recent L to Blue.


1. Blue Bayou

The reigning champ is also atop the power rankings, although not by much. Blue's gonna have to continue to bring that heat to keep this spot, Champ or not. He's easily capable of it though.



Top Punches


Inf we’re NCs tag team champs. it’s awesome! we went home w/ two belts
thanks for the support man…agreeing to use only two of ur bars was a huge help
-Blue Bayou


Lucky for me his wife cheats too. w/ an ass i'd be happy to eat thru
She Benthic homie...I'ma dive in as a Bottom Feeder before I go in'er Deeep Blue
-Exalted

Mamba mentality w/ the ratchet. & guess what? I PRAY u bring ya team.
Cuz once I grab the pump, fakes run or risk getting taken off their feet.
-Ryno


we both chasing the dragon, I got hydro, fire purple with my eyes low
he's passed out assed out in the crack house - that's where you can Spyro
-Josh S

This kid jumped out the closet, nothing to hold em back with...
If the cops gotta get ur princess, their system will tell them ur a strait up faggot
-Ronin

It's sad but the shits true. I'll fuck up your whole crew & ya bitch too
when Blue said you were at the Masters, I just pictured you in a gimp suit.
-Spit

U could drive up to a hoe & say u got more money than banks can provide,
But even when ur ‘pick-up game is Uber smooth’...it always ends with “thanks for the ride”
-BodySnatcher


nothin like a hater claimin aussie life's the baddest
yeah... maybe if u Straya way from talking like a faggot
-Barcotic

I clean my money so the feds can’t trace it. A boss w/ the riches, coward
I’m on that laundering business. You’re on that lawn during business hours
-Dominate




Week 7 Previews
by Clout


Championship
Blue bayou vs Dominate.

The bastard that dies but comes back alive time after time Bluebayou Snow. He is honor roll to school Dominate this time around. He's so dialed in that he called me on dat twitter last night saying he will da-feet dom like cutting his legs off. Blue comes equipped with 0 skill, a helmet & a chinstrap to prove it. But has a Grace every fuck boy can swoon over. I mean this canuck has a boyish charm that'd melt the Night kings heart! Dominate is a walking cerebral cortex with more threats than angry vegans write to boars head. Dom's angry like everyone who chose a teaching career because he isn't making trump money. But deals with people as ignorant & rude as trump on a daily basis (teens yuck). The crocodile dundee who rocks a man purse in a Humvee vs. The man who collected all the pokemon cards in Westeros. Can blue bayou get revenge on the kangaroo danger dude? Or will Blue be sent to detention with no chance of extra credit. Get ur report cards & excuses for why ur failing ready Cus its on!

60/40 DOm only because he's 1-0 vs Bluseph


Spit vs Useless

The Spit that never dries is here to kick useless cousin so hard in the jaw. That useless suffers another circumcision#pause. Spit is coming with such a harsh tone... it'd make dominate & orc's accent disappear to sound more American. Spit is the guy who drew a dick on your favorite notebook in highschool. When it comes to having a prick's demeanor he makes the grinch green with envy. While useless has a way to irk people so bad; it makes barcotic seem like a puppy with a stupid bowtie on. Useless is here to prove u can fuck ur own cousin in bumfuck georgia & still be a respectable person. The man who drives a cummins diesel truck with a 2019 im my own grandpa hat vs The man who is spitacular & is anti-incest. This will be a good one if the useless of old shows up!

70/30 Spit only because useless has yet to show his true form


King vs Aero

Aero what will you do? what will you fucking do when those tangerine boatshoes run amok all over u brother?!?!?!?! King might be the coolest uncool guy ever. I mean he has a dumb hair cut with great hygiene. He's tall & might be, possibly be a distant cousin cause he is tall & like 5% icelandic when he wins. But if u lose? ur nothing to me its over! Aero is like the black cousin on my mother's side i never wanted. I just lock eyes with him to acknowledge he exists. Then i dart past his ass like im late for an appointment. He's the reason wakanda remains shielded & hidden from existence. They just hope he kind of forgets about them like we do his text ability #wentherebrosup!?! The coolest uncool whiteboy with a poker face that has gaga seeking copywrite infringement vs The Black man who has a penny fetish with a twist of hating traditional soul food cause he's born in china. Can aero make every virgin nerd reach into their spank banks & visualize him having sex with kings right hand aka girlfriend? or Will king wear hobo mits & squash the Chigro's dreams of "im fucking ur girl" bars?!? My vote? is King because he's most hated Friend i've yet to beloved<3

70/30 King


Josh S. vs Barcotic

Now joshua u have alot of personal ammo you can use from last weeks nuclear meltdown. But barcotic is really extra motivated to win & regain favor within the text world. Barcotic went to his garage and shaved another chuck liddel mohawk via the lawn mower & reignite the flames of war. He is ready to spin kick ur mistress & arm bar ur moms car. JOsh will need the agility of a elephant on nyquil with a splash of a baboon keeling over from a UTI. Who will scream lightning bolt at eachother in a more fierce nerd rage via LARP event?!?!

70/30 Barcotic


JEM vs Kill Spree

This one will be a good one, i personally like how JEM words his stuff. Its like an American Orc without the super crisp wording. He is getting there & showing mad improvement each battle. Kill spree is well TUI texting under the influence from a bar wifi near u. Kill spree is going to be a hot rod here with his liver strapped in the passenger seat beside him. He is favored b/c of the accomps & wins he's had. I mean the guy beats a breathalyzer every night how the fuck can you not favor him?!?!

60/40 KS but Jem can win this...


Resin MIC vs RBS

This is the third time they battled i believe? The battle i read Resin really showed that theirs levels. But RBS is here to prove black dont crack. This is going to be a good one i always enjoy RBS battles as well as resins. Nothing but respect for these two bastards. May the best writer win. Make the upper darby barbie army proud RBS. May the power of the black panther be stripped away its go time!

70/30 Resin due to what i read from last battle but RBS can win




Outro


Assuming they actually respond, shout out to @EXalted and @Lay Doubt for the interviews. Props to @Clout for the hilarious previews week in and week out, and also for helping run the league. We're in the second half of the season now, battles are going to start having playoff implications reaaal quick so bring that fire. I'm looking forward to some HOF worthy playoffs. Lets do it.

[Blue Bayou]

Dope stuff King...thanks again for stepping up in my absence earlier on in the week. This was a good read, hope these interviews pan out
@Clout lmao, every week I think I'm gunna finally be board of the predictions section but this was generally funny throughout again...props

Confirmed - $250 for the winner of this seasons LLL. Bring the flames.

[Lay Doubt.]

Got snuffed on a battle preview by @Clout daaaang where's it at tho?


@King interview sent my dude

[Sting3r]

Great mag, when I win the whole thing I’ll donate it to a charity to stop gun violence. Yw


Also big ups to king and bayou, stay up blue

[$pitacular]

Great mag, looking forward to the interviews

[King]

Lay Doubt interview added

[Clout]

Got snuffed on a battle preview by @Clout daaaang where's it at tho?


@King interview sent my dude

Apologies I didnt see you had a battle till now. If it helps I was suppose to battle reflex like 6 times but it got canceled 6 times because barc couldn't make up his mind if he wanted to battle reflex or not haha

[Blas]

cool mag, I'll gladly sign back in to battle lay doubt since he's by far the largest faggot to ever type on a text board. pz.

[King]

both interviews added

[Orc]

Great mag fellas. Good effort from everyone involved.

[Spree]

Good shit... idk why @Lay Doubt so obsessed with me tho... next week set me lay and blas in a triple threat

[$pitacular]

Good shit... idk why @Lay Doubt so obsessed with me tho... next week set me lay and blas in a triple threat

DO IT

[King]

Good shit... idk why @Lay Doubt so obsessed with me tho... next week set me lay and blas in a triple threat

yeaaa make that shit happen

[Lay Doubt.]

It’s always funny to me when mfs pride/ego get in the way of reality and common sense. Both these scrubs know goddamned well they’ll get the business against me lmao

[$pitacular]

It’s always funny to me when mfs pride/ego get in the way of reality and common sense. Both these scrubs know goddamned well they’ll get the business against me lmao

I just want to see it!