Intromotherfuckingduction
Yoooo! It's taken seven weeks but the league is finally kicking into gear. We had a handful of good sign-ins last week including prior season champ Ronin and perennial powerhouse Blue Bayou. Then this week we got some more dope names signing in with Unfukwitable, Aero, Exalted, and Fresh all showing up. I'm looking forward to the close of the season and playoffs, some dope battles ahead.
Shout out to @A. Diction for putting together this mag. He did the entire thing so give him some props for stepping up and getting it done.
Let's get into it...
Battle Reviews - Week 6
By: useless
Match of the Week
Contenders - Ryno vs. Grimm
Grimm has good concepts and potential, how hes 5 n 0 idk. Bash had the smoother read and cleaner hits imo.
Winner: Ryno
Loser: @Aero
Slecht vs blanco bishop
I thought blanco won with his smooth wording and delivery but the voters thought slecht got it with better concepts and connections. Close battle
Winner: slecht
Loser: @Aero
king vs kill spree
King keyed this up but it still read smooth and had some impactful punches. Ks had a good showing but hes gonna have to bring more than that to take down king
Winner: King
Loser: @Aero
[I)blue bayou[/i] vs MoFo
Blow out
Winner: BB
Loser: @Aero
useless vs echelon
Thought some of my lines were underappreciated considering the opponent but whatever
Winner: useless
Loser: @Aero
Top Punches
By: useless
@Blue Bayou vs @MoFo
read your last battle & boyyy it’s time you started kickin the bucket
it’s one thing to Chemo...but that shit legit made us sick to our stomachs
@King vs @Kill Spree
Ur pathetic, winning is something u'll never know slob
I'll put this heat to ur chest n it won't be for a Yellowstone job
Kill spree vs king
Twin tools have you take flight, cos that angle you took from B was sloppy..
Squeeze these glocks so the only talk of you & “departures”, your soul leaving ya body
@Blanco Bishop vs @slecht
I'm armed to the teeth cuz you just never know who might try you.
Got some Nerve fuckin w/me—leave you dead-cold or in therapy...no cryo
Slecht vs bishop
His mom is a local prostitute. Gives a mean head and likes to be called the twerk slut
But the city calls her the swear jar, the way she'll settle for just some change per fuck
@Ryno vs @GrimmReaperZ
Me & these weapons go bonkers. See this cat is a goner...
Cuz once I bring Grimoire...he’ll need a spell to bring em back from this slaughter.
Grimmreaperz vs Ryno
Ur legend resonates where? After that showout with Skepto…we aint apt to agree
got guns Unlimited, still.. only apparel have Ryno put on a shirt to Ecko THAT to a tee
@Joe Boston vs @Networth
No reason to confess your bitch assness
your not swinging don’t get hyped
Before NetFlix Blade on me hes better off on there watching trilogies of Wesley Snipes
Networth vs Joe Boston
U guys are never on your job, u kno he ass King n this is proof reoccurin again
So Joe for the record, you'll check in AND out of this battle before securin a Win
The rest of the battles didn't have punches and I try not to quote my own punches but my opponents verse was worded terribly with blah concepts I didnt see any punches neither did anyone else.
Corniest Bar of the Week
Networth!
Joe shuld cut grass,least then what he shape wuld garner attention, psss who am I kiddin
After witnessing Joe Shmoe... theyd hire a landscaper next day and swear that Nobody did it!
U win this week with a beautifully cringeworthy bar. Congrats bro. Dont feel bad you'll see other good writers names up here this season.
Power Rankings
1. King: that's right I put king, people forget he beat BB in the season finale and obv capable of beating him again if he invest the time.
2. Blue Bayou: what hasn't he champed. I'm not as pessimistic as bar, I think good writers will keep signing in and blue will catch an L or two this season.
3. Aero: hes a flaming fgt but he got bars. Hes beat enough top ppl to earn his spot at #3. Even tho he bit from zelph lmao
4. Unfukwitable: that dude. Capable of beating anyone in the league with his mixture of dope concepts and unorthodox wording.
5. Fresh: I wanted to flip u and aero spot cause the run u had at NC. But u havent battles in a while iirc so u round out the top 5.
Honorable mention to exalted if hes who I think he is he would've been #3.
Battle Previews - Week 7
Grimmreaperz vs aero
If grimm wrote like a normal human being his verses would get more love. Hes got concepts and executes well, but aero the master of wording concepts for max impact. He has his misses too so he shouldnt sleep on grimm
Odds
Grimm 100/ aero 0
Kill spree vs jutebox
Should be an easy one for ks if he shows wording like he did in the blue bayou battle he got robbed in. Jutebox needs to quit crying and start elevating.
Odds
Ks 75/ jutebox 25
Slecht vs cacique
Slecht record doesn't reflect his skill, he went on a ns binge for a few battles. Cacique ain't no push over iirc so slecht better bring his A game.
Odds
Slecht 60/cawk 40
Unfuk vs Fresh
Why make this match when they both sign in, give em a warm up. Hopefully they both show and actually try. If so this could go either way, fresh got good wp, unfuk got good concepts. Cant call it.
50/50
Echelon vs exalted
Easy w for exalted
Odds
Exalted 100/synacog 0
A disciple vs mofo
Worse match of the week. I'm not reading it sorry not sorry
Winner: no one
Blanco bishop vs blue bayou
King u wrong for this, let my dude spar before he goes against a top guy. Blanco got bars but blue is just too polished.
Odds
Blue 75/blanco 25
Networth vs Miracle
Let's see if net can get away from the corny concepts and execute his punches. Havent seen miracle txt in a while so it should be interesting.
Odds
50/50
and the worse champ match in history goes to.....
Bash vs Joe Boston
Not surprised to see bash here, hes had plenty of title shots in the past. But when joe Boston is in a title match u know things have gone to shit. Hopefully we're gonna remedy that as long as everyone shows.
Outro
Props to everyone for showing up last week, I can't remember the last time we had 0 no shows in a week of LLL so that's dope. We just gotta get the voting going, it's been a little slow to get battles closed and with this many people signed in we should definitely be getting more votes per battle. I'll be doing more mag content next week, Ronin beat me too it this week and in prior weeks it would have been a waste of time tbh That's it for this week, new cypher up tomorrow.
Originally Posted by Kill Spree
