Week 8: A Disciple (2-5) vs Cred (0-0) Cred wins

[King]

https://i.postimg.cc/Z5nm0vZz/LLL-LOGO.png


LLL Season 24
Regular Season Rules

10 lines
(unless agreed upon by both battlers)

No Bullshit Allowed

MUST CHECK IN BY WEDNESDAY!!

VERSES DUE FRIDAY 11:59 PST

24 hour EXT must be granted by opponent

BATTLES CLOSE SUNDAY

[Cred]

I’m bout to fuck u up ronnin

[A Disciple]

Check - am I too late?

[A. Diction]

I’m bout to fuck u up ronnin

That's not me bro

[A Disciple]

Cred, cred... dead in his head
Paid for a trick but instead got tied to his bed
Naked and dick hard with his legs wide spread
She robbed him for extra then the bitch fled
Cred screaming for help but no one can hear what he said
She played him like the eye do going thru the needle with thread
You would've been better off if she pumped you full of lead
That's not your blood, it's just your face that is that bright red
And that's the murder she wrote - the article read
Now the feds wanna know how you even got that bread

[Cred]

Scare who? Fully automatic wit the drum; shoot once but air two
Bitch ur gettin more bangs to the head than that fucked up hair do
This can’ll leave u on ur ass n I ain’t talking bout Duff
Moes tavern.. bitch u gon see somethin real ugly in front of ur mug
Long barrel or the snub? Rearrange features wen I’m blastin clips
Bitch I’ll have u lookin different from that Nose on sum Michael Jackson shit
2 rounds to ur face like spa day, this burner gon rub you
Put the heat on this big bitches back.. fat girls need love too
Stupid hoe u ain’t famous. Shoot my shot n I will score from 3
U get the box then put in the sky.. ur life look like a fuckin billboard to me

[Networth]

Cred screaming for help but no one can hear what he said
She played him like the eye do going thru the needle with thread
You would've been better off if she pumped you full of lead
That's not your blood, it's just your face that is that bright red


^decent lil rhyme shceme..altho a bit repetitive there was good structure, and a cool flowing story that was actually fairly interesting to read.. This is your best verse so far By far.. you'll wanna keep this up, but with more ill intent or actual personal shots when at all possible..
-5of10


Versus

Scare who? Fully automatic wit the drum; shoot once but air two
Bitch ur gettin more bangs to the head than that fucked up hair do
Long barrel or the snub? Rearrange features wen I’m blastin clips
Bitch I’ll have u lookin different from that Nose on sum Michael Jackson shit
2 rounds to ur face like spa day, this burner gon rub you
Put the heat on this big bitches back.. fat girls need love too

^Nicely delivered verse here with some cool wordplay, some comedic shots and some well placed sting at your opponent. I can see you won't drop to your competition and that's something others( myself included) need to work on.. I cant see you losing this one
-7of10

V/Cred

[A Disciple]

@Toobs but how he knew my step dads name?

- - - Updated - - -

And on this vouix - shit - let me find out LOL

- - - Updated - - -

Bitch I don’t wanna be famous - I just want to be rich

[A. Diction]

Lol body

V. $$$$$

[A Disciple]

I quit... I don’t entertain stalkers

- - - Updated - - -

SICK FUCKING FREAK

[Relijus]

A Disciple.. lay off the sexual references and the simple ryhme scheme (dead, red, bed, etc). I believe you can come harder. You put together some decent open mics, I believe if you gave it a little thought and got nastier and stopped pulling punches you can do this battle shit! That said. I don't think your verse was up to par for this battle..

Cred had better punches that were delivered a lot better. He had better wordplay and his flowed better.

VOTE CRED, but respect to AD, keep pushing..

[Fresh]

Cred, cred... dead in his head
Paid for a trick but instead got tied to his bed
not a fan of this
Naked and dick hard with his legs wide spread
She robbed him for extra then the bitch fled
ehh not feelin it
Cred screaming for help but no one can hear what he said
She played him like the eye do going thru the needle with thread
better attempt at forming a punch but not landing hard
You would've been better off if she pumped you full of lead
That's not your blood, it's just your face that is that bright red
i get what you're going for but again not packing much heat here
And that's the murder she wrote - the article read
Now the feds wanna know how you even got that bread
not a fan

you need to read some other batttles and get the idea of how to form a punch and be more harsh towards your opponent.

vs

Scare who? Fully automatic wit the drum; shoot once but air two
Bitch ur gettin more bangs to the head than that fucked up hair do
lol nice
This can’ll leave u on ur ass n I ain’t talking bout Duff
Moes tavern.. bitch u gon see somethin real ugly in front of ur mug
diggin it..
Long barrel or the snub? Rearrange features wen I’m blastin clips
Bitch I’ll have u lookin different from that Nose on sum Michael Jackson shit
this was ok but losing steam here
2 rounds to ur face like spa day, this burner gon rub you
Put the heat on this big bitches back.. fat girls need love too
this is good haha
Stupid hoe u ain’t famous. Shoot my shot n I will score from 3
U get the box then put in the sky.. ur life look like a fuckin billboard to me
this was just ok

vote/ the gun bar king

[miracle]

I got cred taking this.. Better swings... Dis is better then the last time i saw but still not there yet.. Felt like i was reading a story that rhymed.. You gotta be harsher n more direct with ur hits.. Get more creative with it.. Cred had a ok verse.. Nothing really wow but jabs thru out.. VOTE- CRED

[Ryno]

A Disciple was entertaining. Fun story. Cred had the harder disses though.
The opener, Michael Jackson, & fat bitches need love too were all pretty tight

V/Cred