User Tag List

Showing results 1 to 4 of 4

Thread: Hey...

  1. #1
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Location
    CT (wtby)
    Posts
    3,547
    Battle Record
    0-2

    Hey...

    What part of I can’t do this do you not understand
    It’s getting worse and worse and always on their demand
    I can’t fucking stand this it takes 1 fucking second to pull a trigger
    What is so fucking important I can’t even figure
    Grab my wheel for what? Do this to me for what?
    Suffer for who? Suffer for what?
    God please... PLEASE stop doing this to me
    I had every right to know I had every right to see
    They won’t even let me be me
    Ever gone to bed praying for death
    I do every night now cause I know I don’t deserve this
    How they even better then me to be able to do this
    I REFUSE to live life like this
    They do wrong and I suffer
    Yo fuck you spin me retarded lock me up then I ain’t your buffer
    +~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~¥~+
    CLA919

  2. #2
    Take a Dose of my Codes Ragian's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Posts
    226

    Re: Hey...

    Hello sister i see that youre still being that valiant resister
    I understand the pain on every blister
    The pain that drives you insane
    The pain that wont go away
    Well i promise you the pain will go away today
    Suffer for who?
    Girl let me tell you that the only person you suffer for is you
    You
    You suffer for the better
    Or you suffer for the worse
    Its up to you to decide which course to take
    See suffering can make us stronger
    But it can also make us weak
    When we think that our situation is bleak
    So stay strong
    Because to choose to be weak is wrong
    Whats right is when you choose to fight
    So keep shining on
    Because ill keep emanating my light
    Aight!!!!!

  3. #3
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Location
    CT (wtby)
    Posts
    3,547
    Battle Record
    0-2

    Re: Hey...

    That was amazing Ragian - seriously good

    Guys, did you shoot back in the dark yet?
    +~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~¥~+
    CLA919

  4. #4
    Soule
    Guest

    Re: Hey...

    This is cool. Short and to the point. I think if you wanted to make this even stronger, the best thing to do would be to elaborate on what what actually going on rather then just expressing that you're going through shit and tired of it. But art is subjective and how the mind perceives it so you're doing you either way and I respect that. Couple minor things to nitpick are spots like "Suffer for who? Suffer for what?" I think if you took that second 'suffer' out it would've flowed smoother. Or "they won't even let me be me." You could've went with "they won't even let me be" or "they won't even let me be who I was destined to be." Either would've flowed better. Overall though I liked it and you did you thing, appreciate the writing. Keep it up.

Posting Rules

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •