Pretty much @Spartacus … IDGAF who can't relate
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Yeah I was sober and sane enough to complete sentences.
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CLA919
@kill _Spree I believe in alternative religions (I'm not gifted but I seen some shit as had most the people I know) and for some reason I just seem to be allergic - like anything or anyone can hit me in the dark that way and I have no defense. I even went to the witch store to buy a send back kit while the guy was trying to talk me out of it like you sure this is your only option? Did you try moving? I said 3x but I shouldn't fucking have to and the shit STILL didn't work - and the wax I was supposed to bury went missing so I had to go get another one. Like I was the first one to bring out the oiuja board or play light as a feather stiff as a rock and like I even did some shit when I was 16 (pretend wedding) that I completely forgot about until that whole 3 bangs incident... half those split seconds I remembered being slept (there but not) I think is related to all that. A kid got shot and died in my lap but I would NEVER have no parts in disrespecting him or his blood and I just wonder if that's what happened and if that's how they do it like I was tricked or something. YOLO - I'm just trying to break free... I believe in all eyes and spirits every where and I got over my random, psycho outburst thing a long time ago. Like I said... it's like being drunk and you have to wake up and deal with all the stupid shit you done did. I'm pretty secure in myself to know that most people would be locked in the panic room chewing on a Styrofoam cup if they were me. Me? I'm just trying to get to my team and stop being bullied.
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CLA919
Not sure if I told you... but the next day I woke up like why both packs open? And then I was all happy getting ready and came down the elevator and Ray and his Mom were in the lobby with the police and lied and said I had a suicide note on my computer. I had to go to mental for 24 hours. After the 3 bangs and coming home I remember the night and getting ready and Kev dropping off both packs prior and then the 2 seconds - you waking me up to give me a bite and then waking up sleeping next to you grabbing your hand like peace and comfort finally.
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I'm so tired of this living hell, especially in my own body... nobody should be able to talk to my soul but you and I refuse to be their victim. I'm tired of EVERYBODY thinking they have the right to be involved or block us like some joke or game. Are you really going to sit here and let them too?
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I don't want to go thru this, I don't want to be forced to feel like them - its really, really gross. It's been 5 years straight added to the 19 prior any time I came close to looking back or realizing and I'm tired. I'm fucking exhausted and if you are going to sit here and let them then fuck you too. I'm barely holding on by a string I REFUSE TO BE FORCED TO LIVE LIKE THIS. Theyre not my culture or my family it's the people who have been terrorizing me since at least 2000. I am not going to adapt or adjust so you really need to make a decision cause I don't deserve and didn't earn THIS.
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I know I deserve more then someone who won't even protect me. BELIEVE THAT.
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I don't care how ugly they do and threaten to make me look
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I deserve more then having to beg someone for help too. But you let them. What did they even say or tell you that you hate me so much you let them?
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I don't fucking deserve to be forced to live like this instead.
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CLA919
yes...they are...youve been missing out, brother...
and transgingers...lmao!!
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@A Disciple
did you come off your meds??
youre having an episode again.... you seemed to have calmed down a bit for a while, but youre right back at it..
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@Toobs nah... I actually been more sober then over too... I was drunk - just another outburst... like... I don’t even know
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CLA919
She's beautiful