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Thread: One Love

  1. #1
    Compositional Standard Spoken's Avatar
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    Exclamation One Love

    verse 1:

    you know i love you alot wit ya funky ass style
    i love you more than ever since we had are forst child
    my love for you is deep...like the blood in my veins
    i love you alway's and will alway's stay the same
    and my love remains..even if your away..never gon change
    never losin faith,never let a passin day come between get away
    oh darlin darlin i just wanna let you both know
    that'll do anything and that i love you both so...
    feel the power when our hearts choose to combine
    the power is strong...the power is yours the power is mine
    when our hearts part you know the sky must cry
    keep on on lovein ya both,writing letters til my pen runs dry
    if you stay, good love will remain to fix me up right
    if you go, rise and fall...rain pour my pain...watch the skies cry
    you who i miss when im not holdin ya real tight
    i love you both in this world til the day that i die

    Chorus...Repeat x2
    you are the ones that i love so much
    waitin everyday for your every touch
    hold ya both close and never letting ya both go
    baby when i miss you both im never shy to come home

    some one stole my heart, 911 this an emergency
    please help me find my loved ones...thanks for your courtesy
    people all around world, have never heard of me
    oh god come upon and bless my family with authority
    i got the love in my heart...git the vibe in my soul
    my love for both my babies no one aelse can control
    my loves like a star for you ima shine so bright
    i love you both to death want ya balways by my side
    dont know where i'd be if u weren't here
    me losin you both.....is the most that i fear
    no one else in the world can hold ya both down like me
    i madethis song for us cus....i really felt the urgency
    to alway's put you first along with makaela marie
    i love you both and i know you both love me...baby...

    Chorus...Repeat x2
    you are the ones that i love so much
    waitin everyday for your every touch
    hold ya both close and never letting ya both go
    baby when i miss you both im never shy to come home

    ***makaela marie is my daughters name
    ***my girlfriend ive been with since 8th grade now im a junior
    ***we had a first child but we had a miscarriage it was gon be a boy so we had a nme for him...MAKAE.....so in honr of him when we had a girl we added a lil more so it would be more of a girl name but also have her brothers name..MAKAELA
    ARTIFICIAL | PO'ETHICS | INTELLIGENCE

  2. #2
    Compositional Standard Spoken's Avatar
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    ok heres a better look at it cuz shit its out of proportion here....

    verse 1:

    you know i love you alot wit ya funky ass style
    i love you more than ever since we had are forst child
    my love for you is deep...like the blood in my veins
    i love you alway's and will alway's stay the same
    and my love remains..even if your away..never gon change
    never losin faith,never let a passin day come between get away
    oh darlin darlin i just wanna let you both know
    that'll do anything and that i love you both so...
    feel the power when our hearts choose to combine
    the power is strong...the power is yours the power is mine
    when our hearts part you know the sky must cry
    keep on on lovein ya both,writing letters til my pen runs dry
    if you stay, good love will remain to fix me up right
    if you go, rise and fall...rain pour my pain...watch the skies cry
    you who i miss when im not holdin ya real tight
    i love you both in this world til the day that i die

    Chorus...Repeat x2
    you are the ones that i love so much
    waitin everyday for your every touch
    hold ya both close and never letting ya both go
    baby when i miss you both im never shy to come home

    some one stole my heart, 911 this an emergency
    please help me find my loved ones...thanks for your courtesy
    people all around world, have never heard of me
    oh god come upon and bless my family with authority
    i got the love in my heart...git the vibe in my soul
    my love for both my babies no one aelse can control
    my loves like a star for you ima shine so bright
    i love you both to death want ya balways by my side
    dont know where i'd be if u weren't here
    me losin you both.....is the most that i fear
    no one else in the world can hold ya both down like me
    i madethis song for us cus....i really felt the urgency
    to alway's put you first along with makaela marie
    i love you both and i know you both love me...baby...

    Chorus...Repeat x2
    you are the ones that i love so much
    waitin everyday for your every touch
    hold ya both close and never letting ya both go
    baby when i miss you both im never shy to come home

    ***makaela marie is my daughters name
    ***my girlfriend ive been with since 8th grade now im a junior
    ***we had a first child but we had a miscarriage it was gon be a boy so we had a nme for him...MAKAE.....so in honr of him when we had a girl we added a lil more so it would be more of a girl name but also have her brothers name..MAKAELA
    ARTIFICIAL | PO'ETHICS | INTELLIGENCE

  3. #3
    TreaZoN sILLable's Avatar
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    it sucks havin kids that young....my girls due in december with our first baby...hes a boy...but shit im 20(well 20 in 2 weeks)and shes 21 in january...so were not tha young....anyway...your piece was a little simple and tha topic was kinda played..but you get mad points for emotion and imagery in my book...keep droppin and elevatin...and g/l with your Babies..~1~


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  4. #4
    Compositional Standard Spoken's Avatar
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    yea homie will do man and yo spread the word man cuz peeps dont seem to see me
    ARTIFICIAL | PO'ETHICS | INTELLIGENCE

  5. #5
    *Peaches*
    Guest
    this was cute ta me...
    seems lik u are verys erious about ya gurl and all...
    structure was nice, topic was very sweet n lovin ta me
    and its good ta kno somebody cares about their gurl cuz most niggaz i fucked wit was neva lik dat, he wasnt there 4 my baby! but good job
    good wordplae in this piece too my nig

  6. #6
    Banned
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    it was good i like the scheme and stlye

  7. #7
    SunSpit
    Guest
    I was really feelin diz piece. Nice emotion, imagery, n structure. Nice flow 2. Keep em comin. 1

  8. #8
    Compositional Standard Spoken's Avatar
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    ayo peeps man WERD come on and holla at this OM man its str8 yo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    ARTIFICIAL | PO'ETHICS | INTELLIGENCE

  9. #9
    Moral
    Guest
    Good Shit Man For Reals The Whole Emotion Came Really Good Imagery Was Cool. Vocabulary Was Decent Keep This Up Man Weeerdness.

    -Moral

  10. #10
    That was deep

  11. #11
    Compositional Standard Spoken's Avatar
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    yo man WERDS keep in it REAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    ARTIFICIAL | PO'ETHICS | INTELLIGENCE

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