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Thread: Random Spit ! Chek plz

  1. #1
    You've Earned a Custom Title! ExPlOsIvE's Avatar
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    Random Spit ! Chek plz

    Yo guys, dis is jst a freestyle written random verse.

    chek it,

    Now before we start i'll teach you this piece of advice,
    I got this secret that hides,
    Deep inside these seeds of evil from a demon that lies,
    Beneath my cat eyed,
    Scared glare that can only be seen clean at night,
    Caused from dreams capsised into obscene wack lies,
    The creatre of trapped cries stuck between my ink and verse,
    So when you reach for that mic please stop and think first,
    Coz' im the satanised rapper the best with the illest twist,
    A dark sided disguised man, a wanted lyricist,
    Wid a police file from freestyles, Grabbing the mic by its chord
    And swinging it to knock your fucking teeth out,
    New to this and you may say i'm whack thats fine,
    Please relax your mind, lets see how your body reacts this time,
    When packs of lines, attacks your spine,
    Scrap your rhymes no you can't have mine,
    You'll have to stand in line, go on grab your nine,
    Or nething else that you pretend you have,
    And i don't mean to offend when i laugh, but theres no competition,
    Your trying to attack somethin thats even beyond your vision,
    Im just a hologram of verbs who uses words like knives,
    Lyrical terets, with disturbed nerves that slice twice,
    And whaever you will say in a sentence bounces reflects,
    You can't beat me punk, I invented the alphabet.

    Tell me what you fink guys, looks weird to read but the flow seems aight wen i red it.

    feedbak plz

    Peace
    Last edited by ExPlOsIvE; January 5th, 2006 at 11:24 PM

  2. #2
    You've Earned a Custom Title! ExPlOsIvE's Avatar
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    Links r cumin.

  3. #3

  4. #4
    Is a ninja Lauren.'s Avatar
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    nice punches, good content, very nice multies. Flow stayed throughout, it all rolled off my tongue wit ease. Maybe try 2 be a little more creative n make sumthin u kno is gonna really stand out, but structure, vocabulary, content, flow, all were pretty much top notch in dis one, good job

  5. #5
    Smoker The Joker
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    i didn't see punches but oh well, this was o.k drop like the internal and stuff but lacked imagery and vocab but it was still good keep it up strive for perfection

    elevate

    JUAN DEla ROSA
    Juan

  6. #6
    You've Earned a Custom Title! ExPlOsIvE's Avatar
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    Thanks guys, yea coz it was more like freestyle written it aint dat deep as it wuld b in a topic writin.

    Uppin

  7. #7
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    i was feeling this piece it was defenitly descent ,
    word play on point nice structure, good creativity
    and all that shit ..................
    keep writing

  8. #8
    Noxious.
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    ^^^agree....
    juss work on da body of the piece

  9. #9
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    this was a nice freestyle piece and i thought you had steady flow and good rhymes throughout. good verse overall.

  10. #10
    Newbie
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    nice flow, hard punch-lines

  11. #11
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    yo dogg i'll battle u.... i'm not that good.. but i wanna gett better.. u go first?

  12. #12
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    lets battle

    u lookin for a battle lets go

  13. #13
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    shit was tight,



    got them multis locked down

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    "I rap like no one out there can fuck with me"


    i gave you honest feed, so be honest with me
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  14. #14
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    Lol nice shit homie make another piece like this im lookin forward to more good shit
    execelent flow

  15. #15
    You've Earned a Custom Title! ExPlOsIvE's Avatar
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    haha thnx for the feedbak guys well appreciated, i'll try and get anufa 1 up like it soon.

    Uppin
    Last edited by ExPlOsIvE; January 6th, 2006 at 09:39 AM

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