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Thread: Twisted . .

  1. #1
    Rock you in the Face Sir Skiddz SoPhrenic's Avatar
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    Twisted . .

    Let me take you on a tour of my life, rhyme by rhyme
    Show how I come up with one liners...
    ...that my girl sniffs all the time...
    And let the pen bleed, the evidence thats left on the page
    Raise the stakes on my wager higher, with each war i wage
    Yet know my life is far from perfect, im coming to my own
    the true me lies beneath the surface, its whereabouts unknown
    And fuck my old friends, I called for help and nobody was there
    Yet they told me that wed stick together like the gel in my hair
    And my ex was a bitch but thats another problem of sorts
    she said she couldn't live without me, saves pictures on life support
    Whatever though, because I inject my rhymes with a poison
    And my twisted life tilts once more, the new pinball is chosen
    So you can sit there and laugh, as I look through this bottle of glass
    Half empty, or half full, fuck it im to drunk to give a rats ass
    But if there was a rat with an ass I wonder how i can give it
    *sniff* *pause*
    was that really coke, or was it salt, damn I knew i should lick it
    But im twisted, its unimaginable another person livin it worse..
    Hell ima trailblaze, it could be worse, but im going through it first
    *pause*
    That made no sense, so let me just roll up another blunt..
    Am I coherent enough ? No, im tripping balls but i dont take it like a cunt
    *pause*
    that aint make sense either, so let me face death through the speakers
    I just bit big pun, sue me, before i take another sip of this ether
    and it all becomes super ugly to my mind, i need one mic to rhyme
    Friend or Foe, I'll never know, the streets is watching, im running out of time
    *pause*
    I forgot what i was gonna say, oh well fuck it..
    ....

    ...and the rapper breathed his last...
    And He left us this recording,which he recorded and wrote...
    ....as he overdosed on crushed up glass...
    Hence Forward.. BURR!
    [YOUTUBE]seYxVBIsycE[/YOUTUBE]
    Just watch My Back, I got the front.

  2. #2
    Rock you in the Face Sir Skiddz SoPhrenic's Avatar
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    17 views no replies.. i love this site
    Hence Forward.. BURR!
    [YOUTUBE]seYxVBIsycE[/YOUTUBE]
    Just watch My Back, I got the front.

  3. #3
    yo that was str8 dawg, it started out a lil weak but you definetly picked it up.

    So you can sit there and laugh, as I look through this bottle of glass
    Half empty, or half full, fuck it im to drunk to give a rats ass
    But if there was a rat with an ass I wonder how i can give it
    *sniff* *pause*
    was that really coke, or was it salt, damn I knew i should lick it

    best four right there.

  4. #4
    Rock you in the Face Sir Skiddz SoPhrenic's Avatar
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    thanks
    Hence Forward.. BURR!
    [YOUTUBE]seYxVBIsycE[/YOUTUBE]
    Just watch My Back, I got the front.

  5. #5
    Aka WestBank Leonidas's Avatar
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    This was pretty Good...I liked your use a vocab and lines, it set an image in my haed as i was reading it. I pictured a guy sittin in his house at a table with all this in front of him and him talkin to himeslef. You set a very good imagery detail. Like Casion said, It was week in the beginning, but you did pic it up. You did a good job.
    RB OG Triple OG

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  6. #6
    Ass status_unknown's Avatar
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    From top to bottom, this was hot. Your rhyme scheme was on point, i never got stuck once. The content was entertaining, i loved the imagery and voice u told this from, heavy in metaphore, you were able to shift outside of the norm and put your self in this position, you were very detailed in doing so. The description was flawless, especially that light reflecting off your shoulder blade bit. Interesting piece bro.

  7. #7
    Rock you in the Face Sir Skiddz SoPhrenic's Avatar
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    thanks alot
    Hence Forward.. BURR!
    [YOUTUBE]seYxVBIsycE[/YOUTUBE]
    Just watch My Back, I got the front.

  8. #8
    Rock you in the Face Sir Skiddz SoPhrenic's Avatar
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    60 views... damn
    Hence Forward.. BURR!
    [YOUTUBE]seYxVBIsycE[/YOUTUBE]
    Just watch My Back, I got the front.

  9. #9
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    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show....php?p=3832556
    racism^
    rtf and hit it up


    this was real nice, you told a great story and the end was reallly creative/un cliched/unsuspecting/new,,, great twists vocabulary was pretty good, multies were there, sorta, not very many, but enough to work, structure was dope, and thw sstoryline worked for the most part, good job, and hit up my piece racism

  10. #10
    Rock you in the Face Sir Skiddz SoPhrenic's Avatar
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    up...
    Hence Forward.. BURR!
    [YOUTUBE]seYxVBIsycE[/YOUTUBE]
    Just watch My Back, I got the front.

  11. #11
    Rock you in the Face Sir Skiddz SoPhrenic's Avatar
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    ...
    Hence Forward.. BURR!
    [YOUTUBE]seYxVBIsycE[/YOUTUBE]
    Just watch My Back, I got the front.

  12. #12
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    ya started a little weak, but as the track went on ya picked it up even though ya had some pretty basic rhyming, but the overall track made up for the rest. nice peice man, liked it...
    *lyrical~boy*
    Living In Sin City From Sun Up To Sun Down





  13. #13
    You've Earned a Custom Title! $ammy $outh$ide's Avatar
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    that was real good
    the only problem i had wit it was that it was kinda hard to read but it was dope tho

  14. #14
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    niice shiit .. gud lines u had there vocab... overall i'd giv it 9/10
    sory 4 not givin propa feed.. i wil do l8r k... i enjoyed readin it stil...
    keep dat fire kumin....
    ''Crying Is Blackmail''

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