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Thread: .....!

  1. #1
    Innovator.
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    .....!

    When the world get's too heavy, Hip Hop helps me escape it - The Last Emperor



    Got the eyes of a fighter, as harsh as a vulture,
    Wearing my heart on my shoulders--the scars of a soldier,
    Apart of the torture; The vanity in conquering this insanity,
    With all of this calamity the nerves of this humanity,
    Is full of tension--Built for the streets layout,
    But I'm at peace for at least 3 minutes 'till the beat fades out,
    Indeed my way out is through H.E.R; She gave me heart,
    The Soul of Hip Hop, The Feel of Rhythm--The Matriarch.
    She became apart of my life--the pride in my efforts,
    The glimmering stars in the night--the prize in life stressors,
    My endeavors are for h.e.r, but in spite I have worsened,
    Cause I'm not mischievous enough-- to pry through my burdens,
    But I'm elightened by verses, relating to tunes,
    Every song is a page of my life with a playlist of moods,
    It's what's sacred to few--most phony fanatics,
    Following the newest trend being only pragmatic,
    But I've established myself--and few would bother,
    Cause Hip Hop's conceived again--H.e.r newest daughter,
    With the cruelest Father; Such a edgy planet,
    Taking His anger out on us, it's so heavy handed,
    These selfish antics on Earth exploding like land mines,
    Cause the abuse of H.e.r brings the anguish of mankind,
    Taking advantage of h.e.r will always rival the cruelest,
    Moments in Hip Hop and will stifle h.e.r movement,
    So come to the conclusion that you'll ride 'till it's over!,
    And fight for the message and then die by h.e.r culture!,
    And write in the present and abide when it's kosher!,
    Reciting h.e.r presence when guns are mics in a holster!
    Not in sight with the posers!--Only there to erase it,
    Cause when he's fierce as fuck--she's there to help me to escape it.

    Got the eyes of a fighter, as harsh as a vulture,
    Wearing my heart on my shoulders--the scars of a soldier,
    Picking the part of the closure--Lets dwell in my patience,
    Cause when I finally escape it, she'll help me maintain it.

    -Nique.
    AI. Legendary.
    19x HOF. Seven Titles. 50.

  2. #2

  3. #3
    Killa_King
    Guest
    I was feelin this piece right here
    First and foremost I like ya style on this one
    Very nice neat and clean structure
    Except that last line was a tad bit too long
    Complexity was on point to every extent
    Rhyme scheme/Flow was was nice
    Meta's were very nice,Vocab was top notch
    Wordplay was there,u flipped it up a little
    Also had very vivid imagery
    All above all this was a deep defining poetic piece
    Keep Spittin,Stay up playa 100

  4. #4
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    you are nice..... First one i had to stop and read a couple times to catch everything... I like how you personified Hip Hop into a woman, and you kept your rhyme scheme concise and fluid.

    At least, I THINK thats what you mean by H.E.R. , but now that I read it again it seems like it might be a more broad sort of meaning...

    Regardless, that slight ambiguousness piqued my interest, nique. So I liked that aspect. Nice piece. props.


    ~KL

  5. #5
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    ^Nah, she's Hip Hop
    AI. Legendary.
    19x HOF. Seven Titles. 50.

  6. #6
    On My Murdaland Shit Arsenist3rd*'s Avatar
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    interesting piece I did like it though I really liked how without a title u understood what topic and what type of shit u were on good creativity
    Blow It Out U're Ass

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  7. #7
    Box'Fresh...
    Guest
    .Nique. this was a nice peice, like Scratch-n-Sniff said, even without a title you still understood the topic...it had a bit of everything, ..i especialy liked the imagery this piece posessed, vocab was on cue, flow was ite,..struture was fluid, metas' and multies were there,..this peice was hounestly the mut's nut's...well done, keeping writing shit like this,..id like to see more...9-10

    if u could leave a lil feed back on my o'm.in link...
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=283115

  8. #8
    ..in chains? Naw!
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    Niquey. Edit your first link with better feedback or I have to close this. Please do it :-)
    ArtificialIntelligence
    Sacred Scriptures Champ: 2006.....Brixton

  9. #9
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    yea w/e
    AI. Legendary.
    19x HOF. Seven Titles. 50.

  10. #10
    Super Spic, w00t! Emerge's Avatar
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    Hiphop*

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    New Writejist Song - Tito Ortiz

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  11. #11
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    You're a Legend for what!? LOL

    Oh my what has happened RB
    AI. Legendary.
    19x HOF. Seven Titles. 50.

  12. #12
    LBS. LyricallyInclined's Avatar
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    okay look man i had to reread this over and over and over again to catch parts of it, first and formost i want to say this was a dope peice i liked the structer word play and all the better characteristics that this had, i liked the vocab and the qoute at the top as well i like everything in this keep up the good work
    AUDIO

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  13. #13
    Planet of the Rapes. Evolve's Avatar
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    Pretty nice piece Nique. Got the whole hiphop/h.e.r thing. It was pretty much a decent piece. Havent been on the board in a while.. but this was a nice read. Peace.

  14. #14
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    Thanks E.
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