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Thread: Soaring on Seared Wings

  1. #1
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    Soaring on Seared Wings

    Soaring on Seared Wings
    By: Dusk2Dawn


    (Class Valedictorian speaking)
    This is an honor to be standing here in front of you all today. Just to think I used to be one of the boys you’d see hanging on the corner selling drugs makes me realize what an opportunity I had. I want to thank principle Harris for giving me a second and third chance after being thrown out of school twice for fighting and drug distribution. I want to thank my parents for always being there for me and not letting up on me. And most of all I want to thank God and the angels he sent to guide me. They got me through thick and thin. Now that I think about, it’s almost like I was soaring on Seared wings.

    (Reminiscing)

    Raised in a broken home, depression and anxiety left me feeling alone
    Aggression eventually came, which only brought more pain and groans
    In my eyes, the future’s unknown, but God had my path already chosen
    I had no faith, like Sub-Zero my heart I thought would be forever frozen
    In one second I could taste ambrosian, in an instance it would be gone
    I felt destined for great things but my attitude for school was withdrawn
    But God kept his eye on me like a pawn, knowing I was very conscience
    He knew that my wings were seared but I would soar beyond this nonsense
    I Looked beyond this, learned that life is obnoxious so find a new perspective
    So I put down the packs of dope and put learning as my number on objective
    A new perspective came into high school with my mind set to get good grades
    But seeing the money hustler’s made, just made me a lot more eager to get paid
    Hustling to get fresh fades, looking back, I was stupid when I was younger
    God had his angels watching over me and their nourish stopped my hunger
    Became smarter not dumber learned about the world that we live in today
    Money the fast way is a temporary fix but there’s a bigger picture portrayed
    God’s angels obeyed and never betrayed through the fights and bruises
    Showed me the value of patience when they could have came up with excuses
    When the whole world thought I was useless they were there giving wings to fly
    They supplied nothing, the knowledge was there all along, and I just had to apply
    Now gravity I defy, scars and bruises can’t hold me down from lounging with kings
    Impossible Never!.............………..The true meaning of Soaring with Seared Wings

  2. #2
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  3. #3
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  4. #4
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    This was a good piece. It was both meaningful and well put together. Though the topic isn't exactly my cup of tea...I must say for what it was it was excuted nicely. The speech created the mood and setting and the verse completed the emotion. Your flow wilted at times, but your overall vibe made the piece bloosm....the entire time reading this piece I was thinking of the movie "lean on me", Anyways like I said earlier this isn't really the type of shit I'm into...but I can't front on your talent....you did your thing kid

    favorite lines:
    But God kept his eye on me like a pawn, knowing I was very conscience
    He knew that my wings were seared but I would soar beyond this nonsense

    ^pretty dope and inspirational

  5. #5
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    Thanks man. Bump

  6. #6
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    yo i like the whole real life thing you got goin in this piece
    the structure was good and i liked the flow
    good concept keep it up man

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  7. #7
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    i liked the way the opening was set up but the little speech coulda been less cheezy..nice story telling ability but the rymes and the flow itself werent super...the story itself was pretty good even tho its been told a billion times its good to see someone talk about making it

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    "Fuck the world, not the people."

  8. #8
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    bump

  9. #9
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    bump bump bump...



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  10. #10
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    rise...leave feedback please

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