Whispers from MY Mind

[Try U MPH]

There ever times when you sit and you contemplate
The ever ending drama that seems to be fate/
Thoughts that seem dumbfounded, really could be true/
The conspiracies and proclaimations of a hidden yet powerful crew/
Some cement there wonders, focusing only on there REAL lives/
Working constantly, yet wont be late for meal time/
ive been there, i am there, i cant stand this boring life/
Yet everytime i ponder new, i get built up with strife/
This...immaculate, we'll say, type of life is strictly hidden/
Thats why everytime i try to reach its gates, i get ripped away, thoughts of it being forbidden/
Im sitting here right now with Whispers from my mind/
Yet this society Has tried to turn these Eyes blind/
2 time felon, they call me a criminal and society tries to choke
No more prison, Yet i still cant Hope to vote/
ill slit my throat, before i ever happen to Change my ways/
Cause these Whispers from my mind actually get thru today

[Mo'nique]

dammmmmmm
i see no one has left you any feed back on your poem
but dam, you really need to work on the structure form for your poems.
this poem was all over the place.. lines seemed run-on
your vocab was decent but you need to work on the way you write your poems

[Try U MPH]

thanks one love