Best friend

[MC Ghosty]

I'm the one who is meant to be tough, but all I can think about is crying
My best friend was lying in the hospital bed and was dying
Two thugs pulled glocks on him and shot him in the back
Did they shoot him in the back because he was black
This track is for him I know it's not whack
Now I'm going to find these cowards and attackThe doctor came out of the room and told me the bad news
I fell against the wall and fell down on the floor his blood was on my shoes
But I refuse to accept the news I'm going to find the crews
It's has been 5 years since you died
Ever since that day you died I have cried
You were like an uncle to Lori she ask and I lied
I'm in the graveyard and standing over your gravestone
I feel alone it feels like it's been a while and Lori and Tori have grown
Hey and your girlfriend favourite spot, the grass is overgrown
Miss you and so does Hannah Lori and Tori
They wish you were back from your holiday reading them a bedtime story
This song is not about glory I know it's gory

[fo11]

this was Nobbish.. You need to write with concepts and structure should be maintained..
your bars look streched..
This was Pretty good topic and enjoyed reading simple shit.. but Your bars are not properly arranged...

Like wite countin syllables

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

dont go like
1 2 3 &
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

[MC Ghosty]

Thank you I'm going to rewrite it