These words

[lostinlove]

Just another thing I have on my desktop, nothing NEW yet

I've got these words on my once broken heart,
Air in my semi protected lungs
And pen hovering above this paper.
And just how I'm going to say it is still in debate
You know how deep my love for you is,
You know I try to deny it.
Now that I can't hide it anymore I'm giving in,
I'm learning to put more of me into us.
Love knows no bounds,
This relationship is built on more then just friendship,
Built more on God
Any relationship built on God can pass any tests.
I can't express how much I love you.
I'm no longer livin in a fantasy
You are my reality.
Feeds
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...765/index.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...877/index.html

[Solidus]

Very heart-felt piece here. It hit home emotionally, a few bases for imagery. You had a few that spoke adequately though. For example,

Air in my semi protected lungs
And pen hovering above this paper.

A breath-taking moment, literally.Well chosen wording, though an extensive vocab couldnt hurt.

And just how I'm going to say it is still in debate
You know how deep my love for you is,
You know I try to deny it.

Found the immediate contrast after the 'floatin' feel was a nice touch. Darkened insides, misunderstood thoughts or actions give alibi to a storyline progression.

I'm learning to put more of me into us.
Love knows no bounds,
This relationship is built on more then just friendship,
Built more on God
Any relationship built on God can pass any tests.
I can't express how much I love you.

Basically, a filler. 'Bridgework' to connect the gap in storyline til the 'Happy Ever After'.

I'm no longer livin in a fantasy
You are my reality.

Now, this was the bar that broke you out of the box from common fairy tale into home-brewn art. Great wordin for an openly acceptin endin. Nice.

Overall, nice read. Keep writin & Live Lifted.