I, like Zombicidal, am a white man. However, he had a list trying to hide it. I will now cross reference it to me, a white man.
I smoke menthol cigarettes. Which I do. <- I did for 6 years.
I can't swim, I just sink. Which is true. <- I can swim. Hell's wrong with you?
I love fried chicken. Everybody does. <-- Same. Popeyes is great.
I never knew my dad. Which is sad. <- I didn't either. Mother died before I started speaking at the age of 18 months.
I speak in tongues. But only in a black church. <- they must have looked at you funny going there, because you look like a caucasian version of Eric Andre at times.
I have a large penis. I have a huge gigantic fucking dick.
I'm black because...
I know every word of every Public Enemy song. <- I used to listen to them as a youngster.
I've read the works of Alice Walker. <- I don't.
I can identify racism in both it's passive and active forms. <- you ARE racist in passive and active forms.
I recognize fetishization and what is wrong with it. <- from a woman's perspective
I know what is going on in Israel. <- They're our only ally there, and they have to fight every day just to maintain status quo.
Because afrofuturism is important to me.
Because a lot of things. Not the least of which, because I am. <- according to the lineage you posted, you are far whiter than you are black. You just decided to select something you're only a small, small, small percentage. That's kind of like a gay guy calling himself straight because he once touched a vagina.
Which brings me to post the following.
That image represents you. You've been on a racist tirade where profiling of the idiotic content you spewed would have labeled you a black supremacist. The fact that your posts wield the type of fact-distorting manner of persuasive writing that modern day far-left liberals are known for suggest you claim whichever side of your %90 white 10% "other" that consists of your genetic makeup is most convenient, much like a modern day far-left liberal. I've noticed you have a kid, and I would strongly reckon the only reason that the unfortunate woman who is that kid's mother slept with you was to get back at her father for something.
Next on the list... you painted your nails blue (or black?) for that picture. You're a white Jimi Hendrix minus the talent and friends. So now either you're looking to Selena Gomez for fashion tips or you're emo. I'd reckon more towards the latter with a bit of the former.
Now, let me ask you how the hell you expect anything to say or do to help you run away from your violently racist tirades. Death to the white man, you said. You judge and blame one racial group for all of your problems... and you're primarily in that racial group for which you blame everything.
Your act is wearing real thin. According to your logic, I should call myself a vegan because I eat kale every now and then. Maybe I should label myself Jamaican because my great great great grandmother was Jamaican. Looks like we are both some real black men in the struggle against everyday racism...
That was me being facetious, of course. I'm clearly a white man when I look myself in the mirror. I'm comfortable in my skin living in an area where white people are easily the minority. I can pass off as hispanic very easily, but I'm not going to do that since that wouldn't be who I am. Learn from my example. I also don't discriminate against anyone for where they were born or their skin color- I discriminate against people for being assholes. People like you. And you hide behind every trope, fallacy, and bending of logic that you possibly can to avoid the truth: you're a damn racist. And anyone who calls you out on it is a racist in your eyes.
I'm not such a narrow person where I define myself and the problems I've had in life by race like you do. I'm a handsome man with higher intellect who can manipulate people and use my tools to succeed... and I do sometimes succeed with my tool. You, on the other hand, are apparently battling a huge identity crisis, you are a tool, and you look like Eric Andre and Louie Anderson fucked and had a kid, then that kid fucked Steve Buscemi and they had a kid.
Moral of the story- most people here may have come in here expecting an actual joke. To them, I present to you... zombicidal. So I will close with an image that represents you and your actions here.