Hate Me Now

[A Disciple]

Hate Me Now


“Dear summer” just another bump on luck
Snow bunny swinging swords like a clock that 12 just struck
It’s been a long time coming
Like a phoenix that rise
It’s been the wrong time gunning
Over a game that I despise
We all pray to be the dragon
Just spitting straight fire
While them?
They just wanna be the paddy wagon
While they just take and take what ever they desire
“A magazine that just fucked up your day?”
Well today… over at my way
A 19 year old still living, even though she just died
Locked in a hotel room and raped for 6 days
Do you know how many times now she gonna try suicide?
So I’m having a hard time controlling my rage
Protestors almost burned that bitch down
But now?
I’m just sitting here stuck still rereading that page

(at least her own friends didn’t do it)


Too many, two times, to true lies… It better never come back around
No love, no mercy, no understanding of justice will ever be found
Just an immense amount of pain,
Like a white flame you can’t see, I’m screaming but just can’t make a sound
I can only try to explain
But it still will only be what it be
Kinda of like what’s it like when I go insane
A prayer that just can’t be, so it just keep going around
I put my life for less over this pen
No love, no life, no winning
But maybe that just was a crack to bust it open
They have no fear in sinning
When you can’t even talk about the shit you know
It’s like dancing circles around a camp fire
As they say the high can only come from the low


I can’t stand this posing
All my enemies attached to me
Suffering in life for people like them?
Now that’s just when I see and prefer insanity
It’s not my zone, it’s not in my nature
And I can’t live if this is just the way its gonna be
Just praying for it all to end
It’s not even my religion but the reason for my blasphemy
I bet you it’s almost always too late before they notice as much
But they sit on the sidelines and say oh well
While they lying to themselves that it wasn’t theirs to touch
Besides and whether or not I’m tough
They act like pressure is the only process that makes a diamond
But it was already refined and wasn’t even rough
But they still sit and just watch from the lines then
In for the win? Bitch please…
Beg for mercy?
Bitch … when is ever, ever enough?
It’s worse then the ugliest disease

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And you pray and you pray every single day... but still, they just won't go away.

[A Disciple]

I don't even care or want to know how or why they were marrying me or sleepwalking me around... I just want EVERYBODY to leave me the fuck alone. I don't even know who is hitting me with pins, and taps, and water... you have NO CLUE what I have already been thru and i've tried EVERYTHING to make it all stop and I don't know how or why nobody will make them. Reality, insanity... look... I don't even need to know... my God can tell me when I get there. I just wanna live in peace and comfort in my own body without them making me look ugly and even fatter every chance they get too. Their dumb ass picture games... the TV saying crazy 40x before I got hit. WHAT EVER. I'm not that desperate to be accepted, in fact I never was. You got the wrong bitch, you got the wrong story and I'm tired of fighting my ass off just to be and feel like myself again. I know this makes no sense to most of you but something tells me it does make sense to some. I just need help in a zone I know nothing about and never did. If it appeared I did, I just thought it was part of being crazy... and I was hallucinating or what ever. A mother fucking tractor next to me after all that? You have no clue how hard it is to control how angry I really am about them getting away with that too. For real. NOTHING is going to make any of this all ok. But you can at least make them stop. I PROMISE you what they want and are sitting here trying to demand at my expense is NEVER going to happen. I don't owe them bitches shit... anyone know how to shoot back in the dark? Cause there shouldn't be points in hitting a "parapalegic" (IE someone that can't even defend or protect themselves or even able to shoot back). IDGAF I'm just gonna hit the post button cause something has to give. Someone may have found my NORTH myrtle beach by now.

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I shouldn't be the only one mad that they did that in myrtle beach to even begin with. How did they even know?

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They did it to disrespect all of us...