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Thread: HOBBIES- straight keystyle/spoken word

  1. #1

    HOBBIES- straight keystyle/spoken word

    Spitting freestyles pre-session, blessing mics and representing straight sickness, letting emcees know whos the pro at this scripture shit, compared your ill-literate so listen up kids/
    I think im hurt from these pitchers syphoning my liver, the only way i front sloppy and i still deliver quivers/
    Shiver blanklessly like your page when your fronting, I roll pages into blunts smoke em up then leave em running/
    Im not judging yourself just your words, they smoke cock like a chicken burnt repetitively served/
    So wheres you verbs? I multiply mental distribution exclusively, with lines hit so impudently I leave confused readers fiending me/
    Abusing me, and overdose, lying lifeless on the floor, thinking they can flow my words on the net without any audio/
    Tooo slow
    Thats what I thought, I seen the lack in the response, my plots are part of art and deep thoughts/
    Even more......



    What next is to come ive slummed further than i planned/ i still remember the day this pen first touched my hand/ not caring whats on the other end then/ now i find myself deeper the ending/ hip hop/ releasing drops till im cut off/ or my fingers stop production like surgeons wrists sawn off /ive spread my name on this net, I dont need an introduction/ They call me worth, thats all you need, im not to open for discussion/

    I work wisdom wisely surprising lines with life findings, I used to write shit casualy now im in the back alley/ defining artist/ showing cats ill type flows/ suspose my dome is so large the top could never be aproached/ these are just samples ample compared to no other rhyme artist/ i tell it how it is and dont use no margins/ use what i got and what i brought to this game, making me "worth the wisest", emcee that ever came/

    Now im sitting back reading shit, wack styles, failed student shit/ that use this art as an escape and dont know what to do with it/ Put down your pens or come and step but dont foregt im up high, knocking your asses out so quick you be like "damn that kid's fly"/ Heres you sample so read back im about to finish up, learn that worth be so sick with the rhymes he's throwing up, or step up, and be infected by the disease that leaves every other writer in bed pissing the sheets....
    word theory... think about it...

  2. #2
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    this was pretty tight had some real killer flow the wordplay here and there was decent a few nice multi's. alot of the content had some goo ddepth to it where some seemed a little to much filler to me -1

  3. #3
    Pot 'Ed pot1ent's Avatar
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    This was mediocre.. It wasn't really worth my time to read really.. but I suppose its good for a newb.. The flow was basic.. It fell off at points.. There wasn't no w/p or metas.. So that was a big disadvantage.. The follow up on the concept also lacked.. Elevate.. Stay Up bro.
    Pot` Ed.

    I dropped to show RM what hot was;
    And this faggot got Butterflies in his stomach the size of Mothra

    Your text is just another weak display
    One fist to your eye'll make it go through that black album remix phase. - Saviour Arraign

    <center>The Faculty</center>

  4. #4
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    You Need To Leave 3 links or 3 names of people you left feedback to or this will get deleted...

    but this was alright i thought....structure could use some work though, your lines stretched out though, just shorten them up a bit and make them around the same length....flow was alright, it fell off at points but it was pretty good....but overall this was alright...keep at it.

  5. #5
    You cats really dont know shit... newb... ha! I got 7 years under my belt

    "Abusing me, and overdose, lying lifeless on the floor, thinking they can flow my words on the net without any audio/"

    Think that fucking line over, you cant point my speed progression or pauses. no wordplay? hahaha i dont think of the word "word" as my dick like you cats do. delete it then. fuck yoursleves if you do. Free speech motherfuckers.


    "Shiver blanklessly like your page when your fronting, I roll pages into blunts smoke em up then leave em running/" right der be some meta and some wordplay fools
    word theory... think about it...

  6. #6
    You've Earned a Custom Title! west's Avatar
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    Yo disgreein with tha other cats here,i thought this was pretty dope,spoken word yet flowed from tha tongue well,there was wordplay and vocab was nicely played throughout also.

    "Abusing me, and overdose, lying lifeless on the floor, thinking they can flow my words on the net without any audio/"

    ^as he says rethink this shit,it was a nice bar.

    Peace

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