Dev vs. Avalon

[Endeva.]

topic - the power of money
due today
20 lines

[Brandon Heat]

I love you... hey if I don't get it done before I go to work... I'll finish it when I get home about midnight... so around then will be the latest I'll post...

[Endeva.]

Do riches and wealth equate financial health, or not?
I debate cos a substantial amount can subtract a lot
Cos what you’ve got is superficial, attracting fakes
In it for the stakes and what having money makes
And what ever it takes, they’ll feed you with for a slice
Until your cake’s eaten, then their tongues a new device
Turning from nice to its not suffice, thus moving on
The yearning’s gone, along with the one who conned
So they might abscond! Tho this is just a possibility
Money could also wave a magic wand, pushing liberty
By Serendipity, or by the means it gives to you
The power to realise dreams, and to live them thru
Buying fast cars, or mingling with stars or both two
Or maybe a trip to mars, captaining your own crew
But few have the collateral, which stay level minded
Yes, most who find it change views like a man blinded
Only their brail’s grinded by the power of retail
Assuming the world and its daughter is up for sale
Cos cash can create weak mortar, crumbling to derail
And you can still fail if the champagne goes to your head
Cos getting drunk on money, can land you up dead
That being said, its power varies like its inflation
So take care, and be aware of possible complications!

[Brandon Heat]

fame melts, new world order means live or decrease,
choosen for you,
since ya brain cells..................for a penny a piece...
sliced ya mind to quarters, can't afford to put forth a suggestion,
that's why millionaires speak our names in the form of a question...
the battle field rattlin hear the sounds in your ears,
we'll all need more than money to gain capitol- hill...
capitols real... in a communist society, hold it down,
outweighed quick, hands-shake shit,
..........................when it comes to britians pound...
in sentence bound, us... to the mark of the beast,
the righteous, aint where right is, start of the feast...
of the born left alone... chicks only pickin the price,
for pimps... who's gonna fix papi that chicken n' rice..?
for tid bits of that cream corn... to preach on,
a small fee for the christians who' livin at home...
look... do the math n' add it plus taxes,
match it to the security you'll never see, payin it's all that matters...
and it makes sence... cause we'll all sure follow,
the detour of the mighty dollar... cause it only makes cents...
the more you reach... the more you sure gon' fell,
sew ya six pence into a suit n' drown into wishing wells...






















*sigh* no one's gonna get it...

[Endeva.]

ok then lets get some votes over here... [1]

[Brandon Heat]

foreal..? nothing yet..?

[Endeva.]

upp [2]

[Exculptifactoriusness]

This was a great topical..I like it from both sides.

Anyways, it was pretty even in all categories in my book.

Flow: This category goes to Dev in my view. I thought that the verse flowed very well and there wasn't any sudden stops in his verse like avalon had. Avalon didn't have a bad flow, but it just wasn't better than Dev's. All lines were pretty much equal from both. Both did good in the aspect.

Imagery: This also goes to Dev in my opinion. His verse had alot of imagery in it.

Cos what you’ve got is superficial, attracting fakes
In it for the stakes and what having money makes
And what ever it takes, they’ll feed you with for a slice
Until your cake’s eaten, then their tongues a new device

Those were my favorite lines. They had great imagery and it connected with the topic well. As for Avalon, You also had good imagery. Again, though it didnt match up to Dev's, It was still good.

fame melts, new world order means live or decrease,
choosen for you,
since ya brain cells..................for a penny a piece...
sliced ya mind to quarters, can't afford to put forth a suggestion,
that's why millionaires speak our names in the form of a question...

Those were my favorites. Good Job.

V/Dev

For the imagery and nice flow

Dev, Hit up the battle with rapid fire in my sig please

[Brandon Heat]

the flow doesn't stop once... what are you talkin about..? *sigh* nevermind...


Vote: Dev...

[Endeva.]

[3]

[¢øS]

yeah dev got this...had better overall flow...
stuck wit the topic more smoothly...
avalon had some lacked rhymescene...
and an overall ok topic...but the wordplay,
wasnt all there i felt...so work on that...
and you said no one was guna get it...
yur right cuz i barely got what ya waz saying...
overall i just think dev had what was needed for,
a more into depth with topicals type of verse...
av had a story more or less which threw him off...
both caught the reader ok but dev wins this...

vote/dev...

[Mr. E]

lol@Av had a story more or less... Good job Dev...

[Exculptifactoriusness]

Avalon, I was just saying that when i see this: xxxxxxxx..............xxxxxxxxxxxx

it makes me pause wen reading it and i dunno when i read it, it hurts the flow.

You still had a good verse though.

Keep it up.

[Endeva.]

upp [4]
nok...lol at personals ans punches, this is a topical fool....

[Endeva.]

final uppin... c'mon peeps get your lazy ass's voting, ill throw one back your way, jus leave a link... a fair one tho obviously