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Thread: My Last Lyric For 2004

  1. #1
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Tha Track's Avatar
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    My Last Lyric For 2004

    Intro - Track Shit
    I Seen alot of shit happen this year,
    my crew elvating
    O.D.B. dyin
    but to tha cops i still be lyin
    HERE WE GO!

    Verse 1 - Track Shit
    i'ma see y'all in 2005//
    i hope i still be alive//
    me and orez, we burn many bitch ass soulz//
    and boy, i learnt my lesson, just play our proper role//
    i was born a lethal lyricist//
    but no-body believed in this//
    i'm gonna stay underground it's better wid who u know//
    cos it don't really matter if u ain't got no doe//
    this be more real than fake//
    just like this some jake//
    i gotta watch tha moves i make//
    4 i be seen wid moneymake//
    *HEY, HEY, HEY*
    these bitch'z don't play, no gamez..
    *HEY, HEY, HEY*
    we ain't gon quit this, no way//
    i be back in 2005//
    makin this part of your life//
    if u laugh at tha shit we do//
    we pop a whole clip in you//

    Chorus - Orez n Track Shit
    this will be tha last lyric for 2004//
    this shit we pumpin will make you get off the floor//
    RE-RUN!
    but fuck it, many souljaz dyin each weak//
    just think of all the hearts slowly becoming weak//

    Verse 2 - Madrap
    i ain't stopin for no-one, once ur in u don't quit//
    not even if my records sell just like it would for shit//
    these faggots in here don't take me seriously//
    but i don't give a fuck, they don't know who i be//
    all they see is their shit, their dreams and their hopes//
    and themself, there's no difference, so give it up hoes//
    talking all this shit to me//
    i'm wid trackshit and ORE to da Z//
    fuck y'all.....

    Outro - Track Shit
    this be hot man.....orez, it's gonna be wut it's gonna be
    fuck y'all hatin me, ur only hatin yaself
    Peace Out!!!
    »Dope|Lethal|Lyricists«
    »South|Side|Swangaz«

    'Insert Random Quote'

  2. #2
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    no hate replies, no crew hatin, no other shit like that
    »Dope|Lethal|Lyricists«
    »South|Side|Swangaz«

    'Insert Random Quote'

  3. #3
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    u have the right enotion for this,but u need to work on the structure,the imagery, and word choice,aswell as spelling,you need to get more into details and so fourth....for this to become a good piece.....i think u need to read other om's and elevate alot before dropping another piece



    3/10
    AI

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  4. #4
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    You need to leave 2 links to 2 open mics that you left decent feedback on or this gets closed, Thanks.

  5. #5
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    ???
    what do u mean?
    »Dope|Lethal|Lyricists«
    »South|Side|Swangaz«

    'Insert Random Quote'

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Credz
    You need to leave 2 links to 2 open mics that you left decent feedback on or this gets closed, Thanks.
    i don't get it either man, explain it more

  7. #7
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    read the rules...

    But....you have to reply to 2 other peoples open mics with decent feedback saying what you thought about their piece...and post the link to the pieces in your thread...and you must use 2 new pieces everytime you post a open mic.

  8. #8
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    ohhh, i get it now, i have to post on other peoples om's, and then leave the links here to show other people......sorry if it got my post count up, i got confused
    »Dope|Lethal|Lyricists«
    »South|Side|Swangaz«

    'Insert Random Quote'

  9. #9
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    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...41#post1907841

    i couldn't find the other link i posted on, i replied on "The Godfather"'s OM
    can't find it
    »Dope|Lethal|Lyricists«
    »South|Side|Swangaz«

    'Insert Random Quote'

  10. #10
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    need more feedback y'all
    »Dope|Lethal|Lyricists«
    »South|Side|Swangaz«

    'Insert Random Quote'

  11. #11
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    Thumbs up

    i think its really good! tell me what you think of mine?

  12. #12
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    can you please give me some more specific feedback, also, how can i tell you what i think of yours if i don't have a link,

    0 0
    \_/
    »Dope|Lethal|Lyricists«
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  13. #13
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    yo man da shit was alright but u need 2 elevate a little more, better structure, maybe throw some good rhymes in there. and better vocab other good open mic.

  14. #14
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    yo thnx bloods, i got another one comin, it's gonna be a keystyle with a simaliar topic as 2pacs "Changes" and eminems "Like Toy Soldiers"
    »Dope|Lethal|Lyricists«
    »South|Side|Swangaz«

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