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Thread: In Protestant Areas Of Belfast..

  1. #1
    ..in chains? Naw!
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    In Protestant Areas Of Belfast..

    Death March.


    "The march, a tradition since 1807,
    commemorates the 1690 Battle of the Boyne,
    in which the Protestant King William of Orange
    defeated the Catholic King of Ireland."


    July 8th 1998- Wednesday

    In Protestant areas of Belfast, violence exploded, as the devoted marched
    twas a Protestant task on a Catholic patch, that killed the good of hearts.
    A beautiful Wednesday morning marred, due to an outbreak in Portadown
    as atmosphere broke, and the bitterness woke, rain came pouring down.
    Errupted did the sirens sound, Police entered the crowd from the rear
    with both them and the army in full riot gear, a melancholy end was near.
    That dreaded time of year, where Protestant youths sparked hate
    & the marchers repeatedly took the bate, tearing away the robes that draped.
    Besieging parties drawn by fate, the religion tattle had come 'n' gone
    wordless entities long. . had now be replaced by petroleum bombs.
    Still the children sang their songs, as a means to begin release
    now the night of violence has ceased. . for now.. there was peace.





    July 13th 1998- Monday

    Now the parade had hit the east side of town, down Garvaghy Road
    how the terror could grab ahold, a vile rumour the police were told.
    Something so heartless & cold, a bomb alert was raised as soon. .
    as reports were released in the middle of a Monday afternoon.
    A controlled explosion rocked the room, ripples from small bin
    which the small device was in. This was truely an unforgiving sin!
    Threats to the marchers next of kin, as they too marched in tandem
    the Irish Liberation warned "terrorists WILL kill at random".
    Still marchers ignored them, even though 3 brothers perished
    an arson attack that embelished, and killed those who were cherished.
    Such a wicked wish, how some people had decided to come so far
    to try and make an issue like religion tear a country apart.


    The door is still ajar, and honestly, from my point of view
    it doesn't really matter which religion you choose.
    As your still likely to lose- confidence, peace and finally..
    if you're stubborn to tradition, you'll also lose. .
    a cherished member of your family.



    Stop the violence.

    -Brix.

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=244427
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...=1#post3388189
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...75#post3401475
    Last edited by B.I.Detained.; November 4th, 2005 at 07:16 AM
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  2. #2
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  3. #3
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  4. #4
    Sammy B
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    Really solid drop here man, especially like the imagery, and discription of the events unfolding as they do. The topic has been used before, but you brought your own artistic style, and originality to it. I supprised to see that no one gave it feedback yet. The best part for me though was the ending, it left a pretty eloquently put message to sum it all up, and had alot of emotion too. Nice drop

  5. #5
    Still in the grave Johnny 6-feet's Avatar
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    An original topic man, and a well illustraited one at that. you painted a pretty vivide picture of the violence in ireland at march time and you're right, it is stupid and it should be stopped. Your use of vocab and imagery was strong and the flow was pretty solid. It would've been good to see a more sophisticated rhyme scheme but this was a strong piece without it anyway. Good to see open mic is still producing talented writers.

    Thanks for the reply, keep on posting.

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  6. #6
    jake
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    ..real Deep Shit...i was feelin this rite here...keep this standard up!!
    ..peace..

  7. #7
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    Thanks for the replies.
    Make sure you leave links. I'll always hit them up.
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  8. #8
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    Back to the top. Damn.
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  9. #9
    Banned iceberg's Avatar
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    this was sick

  10. #10
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    ^^Worst feedback ever in the history of man.
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  11. #11
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    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=246957
    peep thatthere^^^


    nice topic, and imagery was pretty good, vocab was strong And you described what was goignon very well, structure was coo, and storyline was nasty

    rhyme scheme was dope also, keep posting OMs in Open Mic Forum!

  12. #12
    is Power Nahlidge's Avatar
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    Honestly man. I couldn`t really get into this piece. Seemed too forced. Like you were forcin` urself to write to the topic. And it just came off borin`. I see that it was a serious topic. But I think you coulda made it into sumthin` more interstin` than just goin` at it straight forward. I dunno. Peeped the replies. They said it was aight. But just not my cup of tea. Keep doin` ur thing.

    A.i

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  13. #13
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    This was a cool story......an original topic....flow and strucutre was good...vocab was good.....layed out good too easy to read...nicely done..this drop was good.....overall around a 8.10.....keep elevatjng and keep it up...you got a lot of potenital....peace

  14. #14
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    yo tha protestant areas of belfast i'm in tha mood for a song

    'i'll always b a womble,till tha day i drop and die'
    'i'll neva b a fenian cuz they're bastards and they're aly'
    'they're all wee fenian fat fucks they're 2 faced slimy cunts'
    so they can fuck off back to dublin, and spend they're fucking punts'
    'so cum on jim don't talk to him, his heads a fucking mess'
    'so b a man, and beat tha man and fight the I.R.A'
    'no mattawat they tell us, no matta wat they say'
    'follow ur father's footsteps son and join tha U.D.A'

    my cousin's from belfats he taught me this

  15. #15
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    nice drop man liked the imagery alot, very good flow and sentances liked how you put it all together man, thats some deep shit, good vocab and all i would give it a 9/10, and like the other dude said, its good to see talented writers on here, keep workin homie and doin what you doin,

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