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Thread: start beef n see wut happens

  1. #1
    Newbie element's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
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    start beef n see wut happens

    yo dawg dont say u a pimp/
    while im spittin im lightin da spliff/
    or sparkin a bogue/
    as i go later on into this battle u may excuse my language/
    after 4 years ya parents will kno ya vanquished/
    fuk wit me ill leave ya ass like t-rex all extinct/
    ill shoot ya ass n not even give ya any time to blink/
    but b4 i pull da trigga look at my left eye n ull see me wink/
    as my clip drops empty to the ground ull hear a clink/
    mayb its a clickity clank/
    wit all this dough goin str8 to da piggy bank/
    as i see u walkin wit ya girl ill blow her a kiss/
    50 had to get shot 9 times to b rich/
    niggaz i spit agianst gotsa b a bitch/
    they cant spit a bar without missin an inch/
    my rhymes will catch ya like ya jus got pinched/
    ill catch ya bitch ass off guard/
    shoot ya ass a couple times n b too lazy to carry ya out ya yard/
    leave ya in da back for ya parents to see/
    print my name on ya chest so they kno it was me/

  2. #2

  3. #3

  4. #4
    BRB, Jumping Ship Baron Mynd's Avatar
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    Awards 1-2 Punch HW Champion Legendary Member Legendary OM OM HOF SS HW Champion LLL Champion - Award Request Accepted
    Somebody already has that name here. Change it.

    WORD P e r f e c t !


    RESERVOIR GODS


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  5. #5
    Brooklyn Bob
    Guest
    aaah...u need alot more practice and improve ur flow and increase ur vocablury

  6. #6
    The True Psycho of RB
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
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    3,164
    Battle Record
    1-0
    This was just some average thug shit.
    The structure vocab and flow all needs work.
    There was just nothing in here to grab the attention if you write about shit like this you gotta put some metaphors or punchlines in there to make it stand out.

    Return the favour
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=177850

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