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Thread: The Guilty Victim

  1. #1
    G.Lord
    Guest

    The Guilty Victim

    The Guilty Victim

    "Silence Approaches the room,
    Every One Stands quiety with the Mist"
    "Lawyers Approaches the Men,
    The Jury Smiles With a Little Twist"


    [Judge Approaches the Stand]

    The Judge Says: Order in The Court Order In The Court
    Your Out Of Control,Cops I Order You to Light The Tourch

    [The Court Room Gets Silent and Quiet]

    Im Not Guilty I Haven't Once In My Life Caused any Harm
    Why Did The Window Break?,and YOU!! Tripped The Alarm
    It wasn't me I Swear That,You Must Have The Wrong Person
    It was You Walking In Thier House,& What was You Searching?
    Why Am I Missed Judge You Have No Proof,Yeah Im Innocent
    [It got Quite at some point and sun was so high out Glissining]
    Why So Silent? Yes Just admit that You Are Guilty at charge

    Thinks to his Self: Just Fuck Its So Long Til I Can Even Pard
    Judge These Questions are Outraged and real Out Leagued,
    May I Continue Your Honor,Yes You May Continue, Preciede
    I Call His Last Girl Friend To The Stage,Approach the Stand
    What First Happened,In Yor House Hold was he a real man
    yeah he treated me like a ladie,nothen really to acuse him
    but he did have medicine,to get up in bed he alway used them
    How Was your relationship,Did He ever try to Abuise You
    That never would of happened,never,but he maybe used to
    Has He ever got frantic around you,disturbed or distracted
    Maybe Once or two since we was together,but i never reacted

    [The Defence Lawyer]
    "Order in The Court Order In the Court,Sir I dont think These
    Questioned are Usefull."
    "How Could My Client Do this to any man or women,
    his are terribably brutal."
    The Wund on that man was on the left side of the neck
    His right arm was amputated this is no time for a guess
    clues,maybe but this is no television show to react to
    Close Your Mouth,No one in the court even asked you
    Thinks to his self:Fuck Im Just go Say I Just Did It
    Its Just Better Then My Family Alive Then Just Risk It

    [Defendant Found Guily In The Court,
    And The Man In The Audience Is Ginning Hard,
    Was This Man really Guilty?]











    http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...67#post3946367
    http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...=1#post3946351
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...38#post3946238

    ill get links in a bit
    Last edited by G.Lord; February 11th, 2006 at 11:43 AM

  2. #2
    Banned
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    4,360
    Battle Record
    14-9
    this was really dope!......love how u wrote it like a story and had diff people talk...the emotion was crazy could see everything in my head when i read it......this just was a really dope peice.

  3. #3
    G.Lord
    Guest
    thanx yo good looks im telling these cats im coming back with somthen ill ya know

  4. #4
    lyrical messiah
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    tennessee
    Age
    36
    Posts
    811
    Battle Record
    1-3
    yo this was aight. it flowed very well an it had some vocab. you did ya thang wit the emagery too. i liked the way it ended but i wish they was more cause it was pretty good. peace out

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    Dope Lethal Lyricists
    hip-hop's finest souljaz

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    this my boo.......guess who it is

  5. #5
    G.Lord
    Guest
    yeah im thinking buot having another part to it ill write it later if im online werd thanx 1

  6. #6
    D Infamous
    Guest
    yo thats waz ill son

    its like a story told in a rap mian thats was ill

    keep up da work homie peace

  7. #7
    G.Lord
    Guest
    thanks man More Fans YAY!!

  8. #8
    dreadedfistofthenorthwest
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Elympia
    Age
    33
    Posts
    2,713
    Battle Record
    14-6
    it was pretty dope. the flow was tight. the topic was ill and very original which i love. the structure was dope too very even throughout the entire piece. the set up of the words and the plot was dope. the complexity was pretty decent for vocab. needed to be elevated a little more. but overall this was a real good piece. only some small minor things you need to improve on to make this piece legendary. overall i will give you a 9.5/10. keep droppin b you got mad potential.



    -Peace
    The R.
    -The Illest Ever Kid-

  9. #9
    G.Lord
    Guest
    aww shizznit AYAYAYAYA mufukka coming up hot now second part i think i might as well write shit hehe thankz for the feed leave links people

  10. #10
    dreadedfistofthenorthwest
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Elympia
    Age
    33
    Posts
    2,713
    Battle Record
    14-6
    yo g. i dropped my latest om. check it out. I sigged it.
    The R.
    -The Illest Ever Kid-

  11. #11
    G.Lord
    Guest
    i got you bro

  12. #12
    EOS_GangGreenEnt
    Guest
    Nice story line with it, well doen homie.

  13. #13
    G.Lord
    Guest
    werd thank

  14. #14
    G.Lord
    Guest
    uppin this ish

  15. #15
    G.Lord
    Guest
    uppin for more feed leave links and i got you

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