Heart and Mind (Ode to Cam)... a must read:P

[Mag...]

Got an assignment from Split. to do this topic... and I just thought this was interesting... no hate... no nothing... it's just one perspective... im not trying to say this is what it's about... just something to think about ok....

Heart

My heart races as my walk paces, eyes down transfixed on my laces
don't call me a racist! why can't you face it? I just wanna be abrasive
It's all in comedy.. a melodrama see? You've all done it probably,
So why you doggin me? I'm a lyricaly prodigy.. should be an honoree
of the Legends forum.. It doesn't matter how I present my decorum
Besides, I don't abhorr em.. only wrote a verse showin i could whore em
to prove a point... you'd lump me with bigots like I'm a part of them
make my life harder when you change the definition of Cam to martyrdom
with a banishment.. though you had to know id return to make a stand again
meh... you'll prolly jus ban again.. but there's no way to make me vanish when
I'm a part of all of you! The insipient smile and chuckle that's calling you,
But you still won't acknowledge who.. gave you back what's appalling too...

Mind

Racism plus RapBattles equals banned barring none at all
Cuz that's just the call and vet or newb someone takes the fall
Ya shouldn't had the gall to take the rules and flout em
your verses might be great.. but that doesn't mean we can allow em
when they're filled with negativity.. there has to be a limit see?
to be a Legend is not just ability.. it's also the respect you breed
you can't be respected when all you do is hate infected
All the members of this site have a right to be protected
from discrimination... or some veterans apparent fascination
with alienation... joking or not it sends a very real vibration
to the core of members.. and adminstration to a lesser extent
The BOTTOM LINE... Racism is not what RB's supposed to represent

just a note... the second verse isn't necessarily my opinion... it's just the viewpoint of those opposite of cam on this issue...

[Mag...]

http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...82#post1266082

http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...99#post1266099

[Endeva.]

when they're filled with negativity.. there has to be a limit see?
to be a Legend is not just ability..
^^dope...

i thought this was a solid drop... you certainly got me thinking...lol... i liked the scheme, smooth.... out of the 2 i prefered the second verse, but you got the 2 done in a way where they went well together.... maybe a bit contravercial,, but decent read.....

[Freeman]

iight..

Jus to start..

Im sure there will be a diss released on you soon.. Baron has too many IP's to be banned.. ..

Anyway.. That is nothing to do with me..

To the piece..!!

This was very interesting.. Made me think anyway..

Smooth transitions.. Could of been more consistent.. But it was iight..

Smooth everything..

Im growing to like your pieces..

Keep it up..

Hit the topical battle in my sig..

Thanks..

Pz..

[Mag...]

I hope there is no diss as I don't think it's warranted... I tried to show both sides perspectives fairly... Cam has an opinion... and it's based on the Heart... But he was banned because the Mind of RB could not support his views...

no need for beef... it's just one man's opinion...

thanks for the feedback tho... appreciate it...

[Chris Black]

Good shit. Ill multis, seemed forced at some points but was nice, overall. The flow was ill. Reading the first verse, I thought you would be on some racist shit, but it’s nice how you changed it in the second verse, and gave both perspectives. This was one of the better pieces in open mic. Also I wouldn’t expect a diss from baron, because you gave his point of view in the first verse. And the piece wasn’t dissing him. Anyway, nice shit. Keep up the good work.

Please return the favor:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...=118747&page=1

[High Class]

I tought this was a nice write. You had a very creative rhyme scheme, and used your vocab very well. You showed alot of yourself in this write, and I like that alot. Good work, the structure was good also. The rhyme was on point, the topic was good, and the whole flow was nice. Keep up the good work hommie...

( please return the favor and peep " The Picture " in my sig... I worked really hard on it, and I would appriciated if you returned the favor... Thanks... )

[Ambient Light]

Not a bad piece,expect Cam to bash you back...
You had few decent lines..

[Mag...]

^^come on... im pretty sure he won't be too offended... i didn't come out and say he was wrong... in fact if you put the second verse first... then read the cam verse last... it would seem to lean his way more... that's not the point anyways...

I see what archival is saying about some of the iffy flow... i was more concerned with keeping the message clear though...

[SMZ]

Well done - many people don't seem to comprehend devil's advocate - you presented both views nicely. Thought the flow in the first part was better in my opinion - a few awkward wordings but overall good - the very first line seemed out of place - every other line is working toward it's particular point but that one isn't really doing anything - Again good job on showing both sides - neither argument appears to be a token - Nice work brethren.

[Split]

beautiful, bro. I knew you could do something special with that topic,

but to the piece, great job, flow at some points was off in the heart verse, but mind showed your strength with the semi-multis (rhyming the same word a few times in a sentence) You stayed on topic, and it was very nice to see that you dropped this within a few hours. Good job, you are a welcome asset to intimate...

[Ace of Aces]

dope. favorite line was the last no doubt. you started off with sum ill back to back multies and even wen you took them out you still managed to keep a real steady flow. real nice on that aspect. whether you stole the idea or not, this a really nice drop man. keep at it.

peace

[Mag...]

^^my assignment was "Heart and Mind" ... it was entirely my idea to do this about cam

[Mag...]

upupup

[Baron Mynd]

Lol at these kids ..
.. thinking id take everything that mentions me on the offensive, im not like that. It was a decent piece, cool concept to it - trying to present a view from both sides was cool, but you got my angle all wrong. I didnt say it was right what i did, i didnt say i believed in the verse i posted - i did what i did because if your all going to treat me like a racist, i'll play the roll you expect of me. The flow was actually decent, it read smoothly - the multi's at times were forced, at others were basic with rhyming the same word which i didnt like, it would of been better if you'd worked those out. Transitions were okay at times, shaky in other parts - you skipped from idea to idea too quickly to really build on the one thought.

I got linked to this "diss" by some idiot newbie over AIM, but yeah - no offence taken.

Cool piece.